How to Connect to a Pen Pal

A pen pal can be a great way to connect with individuals from around the world.

Finding a pen pal can be a great way for individuals of all ages to meet and communicate with new friends. In a recent article, the Observer notes that "Friends can be our best weapon in times of adversity." Pen pals can also be a perfect way to learn about other cultures by connecting with individuals from around the world. If you plan to search for your pen pal connections online, safety is very important. A few considerations can help you find rewarding lifelong friendships.

Instructions

1. Choose an appropriate pen pal connection service. You can find services online or through trade or specialty publications, newspaper and magazine advertisements. Online services have the advantage of being simple and quick, but they also pose certain safety issues that you should be aware of.

2. Select the criteria for your pen pal. Typical considerations include gender and age preference and what country she lives in.

3. Decide on the information you would like to share with your potential pal. This information might include hobbies and interests, topics you enjoy discussing and what you would like to achieve through a pen pal relationship. Do not share personally identifiable information, such as your home address, phone number or last name until you are certain that your connection is a legitimate one. Pen pals should never ask for this information either.

4. Write a short but descriptive profile. Successful profiles are typically no longer than one or two paragraphs. Write creatively to capture the reader's attention, but don't forget to provide the basics about your interest in acquiring a pen pal and other information you would like to share with potential connections.

5. Begin reviewing profiles. Most online services allow users to search by general interest categories, such as hobbies or profession, gender and age. Read each profile to determine if you may have some common interests.

6. Respond to those profiles that sound intriguing. Be careful not to respond to too many profiles at one time, however. If by chance each person you contact responds, you may have far more pen pals than you originally planned for.

7. Read the guidelines for information about appropriate connections. Some websites allow you to make friend connections online, send information via email or post greetings on profile pages.

8. Always be courteous and polite when corresponding with others. Keep in mind that different cultures may have their own informal rules about interactions with the opposite sex. Do your research if you plan to correspond with individuals from a country you are not familiar with.

9. Respond promptly and never leave a pen pal waiting. If you no longer wish to correspond, send a short, clear message letting the individual know that you have too many other commitments and you can no longer continue to correspond with him. Hide or remove your profile once you have found one or more pen pals.

Tips & Warnings

• Learn a few words in another language if you choose to interact with individuals outside your own country.

• Reply to people if they contact you, and try to write quickly. Nobody likes waiting around. Keep up with all of your letters.

• Never display your email address on your profile.

• If you are writing traditional letters, be patient, especially if your letters will be traveling overseas.

• If you become suspicious about an individual you have connected with, contact a services administrator immediately and inform them of your concerns.

• Contact your local emergency services if you are ever threatened or feel threatened by someone you have connected with through a pen pal service.

• Don't arrange to meet people alone who you have met on a website. If you do decide to meet, take a friend along and meet at a mall or a busy restaurant.

• If you're under 16, ask a parent or guardian's permission and choose a website for teenagers.

References

• The Observer; Friendship studies reveal the power of pals; Sarah Wilson; March 2009
• PenPalParty.com: Pen Pals Frequently Asked Questions