How to Encourage Self Confidence
Self-confidence comes from believing that you are strong, valuable and capable. People who exhibit this trait are sure of themselves, unaffected by the opinions of others, and unafraid to take risks. A lack of self-confidence can begin in childhood, especially for girls, and remain throughout their lives. But that does not mean you must remain stuck in a lack of confidence. New behaviors can be learned at any age, allowing you to become more confident in your abilities and contribution to the world.
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Instructions
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Set and meet new goals. The goal can range from taking up a new hobby, trying out for a sports team, learning a musical instrument, or reading a difficult book. The idea is to try something new -- aiming not for perfection, but for completing the task. You can feel proud of learning something new. This builds confidence and will inspire you to tackle the next goal.
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Help someone else who is less fortunate than you, or in need of your skills. Doing so allows you to think of others, taking the focus off your own perceived inadequacies -- and it helps you build confidence in the abilities you do have. Volunteer for an organization such as a soup kitchen, nursing home or pet shelter. Tutor a younger child. Bake cookies and take them to an elderly neighbor. Send an encouraging card or call someone who is going through a difficult time and offer words of encouragement to them.
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Look for positive role models to encourage you to try harder. History is full of men and women who overcame difficult obstacles in life to achieve their goals. Many athletes exhibit determination and persistence. Numerous leaders model character and integrity. And people in your own community can offer encouragement through their actions. Allow yourself to be mentored by others, whether through reading about their lives or watching them in action.
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Practice being assertive. Assertion is expressed through body language -- such as making eye contact with others, standing up straight rather than slouching, giving firm handshakes, and not crossing your arms across your body. It can also be expressed through the use of proper facial expressions. For example, do not smile to hide that you are upset if the situation warrants expressing your true feelings. Run through scenarios that normally make you uncomfortable, practicing assertive body language and facial expressions either in a mirror, or with someone you trust that can provide feedback and encouragement.
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Develop healthy friendships with people who are trustworthy and interested in communicating and sharing equally with you. Spend time with the positive people already in your life, getting to know them better, if possible. Developing deeper friendships take time, but you can make it a priority to meet others with common interests -- join a club, find a church, take up a new hobby, or volunteer for a charity. Ask other people about themselves, and truly listen. Look for others who do the same for you -- healthy relationships cannot be one-sided.
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Tips & Warnings
Having multiple strong friendships also builds self-confidence, rather than just one close friend.
References
- Good Tree Coaching; "5 Tips to Encourage Self-Confidence & Discourage Mean Kid Behavior"; Melinda Runkle; April 2010
- Health Guidance; "How Do You Encourage Self Confidence in Girls?"; Connie Limon
- Skills Management: "20 Tips To Building a Strong Self-Confidence You Didn't Have Earlier"; October 2007
- Anxiety Made Well: Positive Role Models
- Mayo Clinic; "Friendships: Enrich your life and improve your health"
Resources
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