How to Write a Thank You Note for Bereavement

Properly thank those who helped you through your bereavement.

Working through the pain and grief of losing a loved one can be easier with the help of family and friends; at the least, you certainly appreciate any thoughts, prayers and condolences offered. Sending a thank you note for bereavement is a nice gesture of gratitude. These notes should be sent to those who provided any assistance to you or for any flowers or donations given during your time of need.

Instructions

1. Prepare a list of friends and relatives who should receive bereavement thank you notes. This list should include those who assisted you with arrangements or sent flowers or charitable donations to the funeral home or memorial service.

2. Address the thank you notes. You can address these informally or formally, depending on the addressee. Address close friends and family members informally, such as "Dear Kathy or Dear Dave." Address coworkers or acquaintances in a more formal way, such as "Dear Mr. and Mrs. Parker" or "Dear Mr. Heath."

3. Convey your thoughts in the note with a short, but personal acknowledgment of appreciation, specifically thanking them for their contribution. For example, if they gave you flowers for the visitation or funeral, let them know how lovely they were and how they helped brighten the sadness of the day. If they brought over a meal, thank them for understanding how overwhelming that daily task was during your time of grief and how much it meant to you and your family.

4. Include a poem or Bible passage in the note that expresses your thoughts about loss. If the person you are thanking is a family member or close friend, she too is grieving. One example is Psalm 48:14: "For this God is our God for ever and ever; He will be our guide even to the end." Include your loved one's prayer card with the thank you note. Some funeral homes provide a card with the deceased one's name, birth date and death, along with a thoughtful prayer about death and salvation.

5. Sign the note using your family name, such as "Sincerely, the Parker family."

Tips & Warnings

• Taking the time to write thank you notes for bereavement is sometimes too painful an undertaking. Ask a close family member or friend to take over the task for you.

• It is acceptable to send bereavement thank you notes a few weeks after the funeral service.

References

• Emily Post: Bereavement Questions and Answers
• Elegant Memorials: Writing Thank You Notes After a Funeral or Memorial Service
• Encouraging Bible Verses: Bible Quotes That Will Bring Comfort in Times of Grief