How to Resolve Grandparent Visitation Rights

Disputes about grandparent visitation can usually be resolved simply by talking with the grandparents and making time for them in your children's lives. Long-standing hurt feelings can be at the root of the problem. Making it clear that they're important in your children's lives will ease most grandparents' concerns.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

1. Evaluate how serious the grandparents are about pursuing visitation rights. They may just be making idle threats. If you believe they're serious, you should attempt to work it out without getting a court involved.
2. Look at the past contact the child has had with the grandparents. Has it been regular? Has something happened recently to change that? Think about what is different and what can be done to fix the problem.
3. Talk to the grandparents about what they want. In most situations, a solution can be worked out. They may feel left out of their grandchildren's lives or ignored. Find out what can be done to make them feel better. Simple solutions are often possible, such as a visit for a few hours every couple of weeks or regular phone contact.
4. Reassure the grandparents that you respect their relationship with the child and don't want to interfere with it. This simple reassurance may solve the entire problem.
5. Talk to an attorney to find out what rights grandparents have in your state. Grandparents' rights don't even come close to parents' rights in most states.
6. Determine if the root of the problem is your own relationship with the grandparents. Sometimes grandparents feel ignored by their children or in-laws. Long-standing family disputes can often be at the root of the current complaint. Think about what can be done to solve the underlying problem.
7. Consider seeing a therapist with the grandparents if there are long-standing family issues that need to be worked out. If you don't have any desire to solve these problems, you don't have to. You're an adult. Just be sure that your problems don't interfere with your child's relationship with the grandparents.
8. Remember that if the grandparents are your in-laws and you and their child are no longer together, the real issue may be your breakup.
9. Consider seeing a mediator if you and the grandparents are unable to reach an agreement. A mediator can help find a solution that's fair to both parties.

Tips & Warnings

• Try to resolve the dispute without going to court. Having a trial about grandparent visitation is usually not necessary. If you do go to court, you may be ordered to follow a regular visitation schedule for the grandparents. You're much better off trying to work out something informal on your own.
• If the grandparents present a danger to your children, do not agree to visitation. If necessary, go to court to protect your children. See a lawyer if this is a concern.