-
Step 1
Realize that custody is determined based only on what is best for the child. When you and your ex-spouse try to decide about custody or when a court makes a decision, the primary consideration should be what will benefit the child most.
-
Step 2
Ask yourself which parent has the most time available to spend with the child. Courts prefer to give custody to the parent who can be with the child most. Time with a parent is preferred to time with a sitter.
-
Step 3
Look at each parent's past. A parent who has abused a child, used drugs, committed a crime or had a lifestyle the court would frown on is less likely to be awarded custody.
-
Step 4
Think about each parent's extended family and ties to the community. Courts prefer that children have grandparents, cousins, friends and neighbors. Parents who move frequently and do not develop these relationships are at a disadvantage.
-
Step 5
Know that religion is also important. If a court must choose between a parent who practices a religion and one who does not, the one who practices will be favored.
-
Step 6
Understand that what older children think matters. Once children are 12 or 13, some courts consider their opinions about where they want to live. The children do not get to decide, but what they think is taken into account.
-
Step 7
Consider which parent is better able to support a child financially, emotionally and intellectually. This does not mean you must be a rich genius to get custody. Parents must be able to provide a home, food, clothing, love, encouragement and learning opportunities for their children.
-
Step 8
Decide who has been the primary caretaker. Usually, one parent spends more time caring for the child. Courts prefer to continue that relationship and make as few changes to the child's life as possible.
-
Step 9
Think about each parent's home. A child needs to live in a home that is safe, clean, stable, warm and nurturing.
