How to Say Say No in the Classroom

Educators sometimes need to say no to students to address behavioral or academic problems.

Not everyone finds telling others no easy. However, for educators of all levels it is necessary to tell your students no from time to time. Educators are asked not just to address a student's academic growth, but to make sure that the student adheres to school policies and codes of conduct. Like parents, if you are calm, assertive and consistent when you say no to your students while remembering to treat them respectfully, saying no will have a positive impact on your relationship with them.

Difficulty:

Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Use the word no consistently. Stick to your answer. Students naturally will test the boundaries of their educator. If you stay consistent when you say no then your students will come to understand that no really means no. If you say no, go back on your answer and allow bad behavior to continue, or the student to acts against your wishes, then you will reinforce your students' understanding that no really means "okay."

2. Say no firmly. Do not yell at your students. Say no in a calm but authoritative tone and only say it once. This will emphasize that when you say no, that is the final answer. If you are highly reactionary and say no aggressively, it will be difficult for your students to take you seriously, and they may rebel against your decision if they feel they are being derided rather than being told no.

3. Think about your student's request before you answer no. If you are dealing with a behavior issue, or a student striking another student, then you probably have little time to think about what you should do. However, when a student asks to go to the bathroom, you should pause, think about the question and then answer. This will show your student that you're processing his request rather than answering no as a reaction.

4. Establish a respectful relationship with your students. Try to find out who they are as people. This will take some time so start with students who have repeated behavior issues. Oftentimes this will lead to a mutual respect between you and the student and will make it easier for you to say no to them -- and easier for them to take your no as a final answer.

5. Be fair in to whom you say no and for what reasons. Students will often ask you, "Why?" Saying no will be easier if you have a good reason, and it will help the student understand where you are coming from and how you arrived at your decision. It is not necessarily a bad thing if the student is repeatedly asking you "why" and questioning your reasoning -- in most cases the student is simply testing boundaries.

Tips & Warnings

• Establish boundaries early during the school year or the semester to establish the relationship you will have with your students throughout the term.

• If you find saying no -- or just saying no to a particular student -- particularly difficult, consult with educators who have taught that student before and find out what worked best for them.

References

• Zenhabits: 7 Simple Ways to Say No
• Learning Disabilities Association of Kentucky: Addressing Student Problem Behavior
• Faculty Focus: Tell Students When They're Wrong

Resources

• Scott Counseling: How To Tell Your Kids No