How to Respond to an Online Dating Profile
Although traditional dating -- meeting potential partners through friends or at bars and getting to know them by going to dinner, movies and other events -- is a perfectly valid way of finding a partner, the time and logistics involved in dating this way may not be compatible with your lifestyle. If this is the case, you may find online dating to be a better alternative. You don't necessarily respond to someone's online dating profile the way you'd approach that person in a bar, however, so you should keep some basic etiquette in mind.
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Instructions
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Use the online medium to your advantage. Although a close pass with an attractive man or woman at a bar can lead you to say something unsavory or even stupid from spontaneous excitement, responding to an online dating profile gives you more time to write a flattering response.
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Include language that reflects your primary intent in contacting the person. If you simply want a romantic liaison with someone and your introductory message praises her physical features, there's not an inherent problem with that. If, however, you want to get to know someone on a more-than-physical basis but your message to her says nothing that doesn't involve how her figure makes you feel, she won't understand your true intent.
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Analyze the other person's profile to get a feel for what he's looking for. Just as sending messages that don't reflect your end goal in online dating end up leading you nowhere, contacting a visiting stranger who's looking for companionship only when he's in your city on business isn't likely to get you a long-term boyfriend.
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Feel free to use your online dating service's "Sent Messages" feature to see whether your message has been read -- but don't send another message to someone if she's read it and not responded. Just as a woman who's not interested in your passing glance or quick grab at the bar is going to pretend she didn't see you, someone who doesn't want to continue a conversation won't respond.
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Don't provide your email address or instant messaging screen name in your first message or ask your potential date for his. Although communicating off a dating site can be more flexible -- particularly if the site in question restricts the number of messages you can send -- being overly eager to reach this stage can be off-putting.
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