How to Tell In-Laws and Parents About Divorce

Telling parents and in-laws about divorce can be intimidating.

Getting a divorce is a difficult, emotional time. Along with confronting a failed marriage, determining the terms of the breakup and explaining the changes to children, divorcing couples face the added strain of having to tell their parents and in-laws about the impending divorce. While talking about divorce with family and friends is never easy, there are certain ways to broach the subject and inform others in a way that is less uncomfortable.

Instructions

1. Make sure to tell your parents and in-laws about the divorce in person, if possible. Unless there is the problem of extreme distance, sharing such important, life-changing information over the phone is impersonal and somewhat rude. While it may seem easier to break the news over the phone, consider the feelings of your family who are likely to be at least someone what upset about the dissolution of your marriage.

2. Consider whether you and your spouse can tell people about your divorce together. If you are on good terms with each other, it may be easier to face your families together.

3. Bring up the topic in a serious, straightforward manner. Simply tell your parents or in-laws that you and your spouse will be getting a divorce, and explain that the decision was mutual and resulted after much thought and consideration.

4. Consider beforehand what you are going to say and how much to reveal. If the marriage ended poorly, it may be tempting to share details and stories about the transgressions of your partner. Even if the stories are true, spilling such tidbits can be immature and may even start bigger rifts within the family or ostracize you from your in-laws. It's best to keep your familial drama to yourself if possible.

5. Stand your ground. It is easy for outsiders who may not be supportive of the divorce or who are surprised by it to question whether you truly want to go through with it. Reinforce the idea that you have thought long and hard about the relationship and that you are steadfast in your decision to end it.

References

• EmpowHer: Telling Your Family and Friends About Your Divorce
• Professor's House: Telling Family About a Pending Divorce
• IVillage: Telling Other People: 3 Tips for Breaking the News of Your Divorce
• SimpleFreeLawAdvisor.co.uk: How to Tell Your Family and Friends About Your Divorce