How to Be a Master Pickup Artist

You need help approaching women.

If you have any familiarity with popular culture at all, you've probably heard about pick up artists. Pick up artists are guys that purport to have a fail safe technique to attracting women. In fact, they are so confident in their skills that they are now selling books and even courses to insecure men, offering to turn these poor guys into irresistible sex gods. You don't need to invest any of your hard-earned cash in seminars or lessons, however. The basics of pick up artistry are easy to master.

Instructions

1. Dress yourself ostentatiously. Pick up artists advocate something they call peacocking. Peacocking means dressing yourself in something weird, flashy or eye-catching. Pick up artists like Mystery, the stage name of Canadian author and entertainer Erik von Markovik, argue that oversized hats or goggles will distinguish you from other men and give women who are interested in you something to talk about. If you don't feel comfortable showing up at a night club dressed as the Mad Hatter, you can subtly peacock by putting on some red pants or a bow tie or something small.

2. Approach groups of women with stories you've made up in advance. According to author Style, "10s," by which he means very attractive women, only travel in groups. These women must travel in herds to feel safe. Thus, a master pickup artist can't be afraid to approach a group of strangers. In order to make conversation with an entire flock of 10s, make up some funny story to impress them all. If they think you are funny, they'll allow you to stick around.

3. Insult the women you are interested in. More specifically, offer them passive-aggressive, thinly veiled insults disguised as compliments. Pickup artists call this technique "negging." They believe that 10s are bombarded with sincere compliments and won't respond to them. Instead, according to Mystery, they will be intrigued by men who are so cocky that they can pick out their faults. For example, tell a woman that you love her dress, but it's too bad she couldn't find shoes to match it.

4. Pretend you're gay. This tip only works if you are actually a heterosexual man. According to the tenets of pickup artistry, pretending to be a homosexual will work on two levels. First, women will feel more comfortable around you because you've lied to them about your intentions and convinced them that you are interested in them as friends. Second, 10s love a challenge and will try to "convert" you into being heterosexual.

5. Disregard your new friend's last minute resistance. Pickup artists like Mystery argue that 10s will attempt to tell you they are not interested in having sex with you because they don't want to seem slutty. This is called last minute resistance. You can overcome your 10's last minute resistance by assuring her that you plan to stick around after you are finished having sex with her.

Tips & Warnings

• Forcing a woman to have sex with you if she continues to resist is a crime and will result in jail time.

References

• PUA Lingo: Terminology List