How to Remove Personal Barriers
Personal barriers are any limitation on an individual's ability to achieve goals in any area of life, be it professional advancement, intimacy, family relationships or something mundane. What a person does and how that individual views himself reflect the balance or imbalance in the relationship between the person's self-esteem, physical ability and willingness to accept the present. Many personal barriers operate on the subconscious level and require time spent evaluating and re-evaluating circumstances, feelings or desires.
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Instructions
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Write down a list of 10 goals that you would like to accomplish. Circle goals that relate to dreams or long-time aspirations. Mark a square or box around goals that represent thrill-seeking endeavors, such as skydiving. Draw a triangle around those goals that involve mundane tasks, such as cleaning the house or buying a new television.
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Ask yourself why you haven't accomplished any of the thrill-seeking adventures around which you drew a square. Some of these activities may be prohibitively expensive. On the other hand, many thrill-seeking adventures are flights of fancy that don't reflect an individual's true spirit and, therefore, these activities are put off. Keeping such items on your list as goals may distract you from focusing on more important dreams and aspirations. Cross off flights of fancy from your list of goals and add them to a list of activities you would permit yourself to do if the opportunity arose.
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Focus on the goals around which you drew a triangle. Consider what prevents you from completing these tasks. Mundane tasks can be difficult to accomplish for a variety of reasons, including time constraints, lack of support or emotional distractions. For example, if the goal is to plant a garden but it never seems to get done, identify alternatives to planting a garden yourself, such as hiring a landscaper to create a garden that you maintain. If the barrier to achieving mundane goals is emotional, identify the emotions that distract you from achieving these minor tasks.
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Meditate on the emotions that distract you from accomplishing everyday tasks. Purchase audio guides from iTunes or a bookstore that can guide you through meditations. Identify the source of emotional distress. Evaluate events or thoughts that trigger emotional distress. Picture yourself responding to those thoughts and events with a different mindset. Seek professional counseling if the source of your emotional distress is abuse by another person or if your emotions seem to have no cause.
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Evaluate the circled goals on your list. Imagine yourself realizing those dreams. Watch for any negative turns in your thoughts that steer you from completing the picture. Assess the process you envisioned for accomplishing these large goals. If the personal barrier is financial, research what small steps you can afford to take toward this goal. If the goal is to own your own restaurant, evaluate where you are in that process now. Are you working as a chef for someone else? Maybe you haven't been to culinary school. Call a local restaurant that serves the kind of menu you would like to serve and interview the owner. Ask about alternative routes to achieving your dream that might not have occurred to you. For many, achieving their dreams helps to remove personal barriers in other areas as well.
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Tips & Warnings
Working towards a dream can be tough work, yet it can lead to a sense of personal accomplishment that promotes true confidence, which can open more doors in other aspects of one's life.
Personal barriers are not the same as personal boundaries. Personal boundaries are discretionary boundaries set by an individual that determine degrees of physical contact and emotional intimacy that one shares with another person.
References
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