How to Comfort a Depressed Person
Comforting a depressed person can be a daunting task, especially if you've never been in a similar situation as the person you wish to comfort. Because each individual person is different, they way they deal and cope with depression in their lives will be different too. Some will need to talk about their feelings, and others will just need your help in getting them out of the house and enjoying some of their favorite activities. If you notice a close friend, work colleague or family member with irregular sleeping or eating habits, a loss of interest in life or suffering with feelings of worthlessness, you may want to consider ways you can help them through their tough time and back into feeling normal again.
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Instructions
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Confront your friend about her depression in a gentle way and let her know that you're there for her. Don't be abrasive and say, "You have depression, let's talk about it." Instead say, "I've noticed you haven't quite been yourself since this happened." From there, let her know that you're there for her and that even though she may need some time to grieve, you still want to spend time with her and be there for her because you enjoy her company and want her to come out of this situation feeling stronger than ever. Depending on the person, you may need to help her realize that her depression isn't her fault, that it happens to millions of people every year, and that it is a treatable illness that the majority of people come out of.
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Encourage him to get off the couch and enjoy life a little bit. Take him to his favorite coffee shop, to a movie, or hiking on his favorite trail. Invite him to your place for a gathering of a handful of good friends to watch a football game or play board games or cards. This will help remind him that life is still good and that there are things in life worth enjoying. It also shows him that you think highly enough of him to want to spend time with him, even if he is down in the dumps.
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Support your friend through her treatment process, whatever that treatment process may be. Some patients will take their doctor's advice and use medication to help lift their moods, but others are morally opposed to taking pills to force a happy mood. Other patients will opt for going to therapy to work through their feelings with a professional psychologist who can give them actionable steps to help them get out of their depressed state of mind on a weekly basis. If you have a close enough relationship to the depressed person and she is willing to let you, act as an accountability partner and hold her to the treatments on a daily or weekly basis.
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Use kind language when talking with your friend or with others about your friend's depression. Using harsh language toward your friend's condition could make him feel belittled, unimportant or angry with you.
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Don't allow the harsh words or unappreciative attitude of a depressed person to harm you or how you think about yourself. If you knew her well before the depression set in, then you'll know that her harsh words are due to her depression. If you need to, back off a bit and give her some space to cool off before trying to bring comfort to her again.
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Treat your friend with depression like a real person and not a charity case. He'll be able to see right though your actions and won't want to open up to you if you don't continue to treat him like your friend. Thank him for nice things he does for you, but let him know when he steps over the line and hurts your feelings. Giving someone accountability for and ownership of his actions will help him realize that he is still a member of the real world and that he does in fact make a difference in the lives of others, good or bad.
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References
- Photo Credit depressed man image by Galina Barskaya from Fotolia.com
