How to Counteract a Compulsive Liar

One lie may lead to a series of negative events.

Telling a lie can have serious consequences for the liar and those around them. When the truth is found out, trust is broken, and the lie, no matter how small or large, can result in destroyed friendships, ruined marriages, ended careers and other negative events in the liar's life. Compulsive liars are individuals who lie often, and the lie may be told for no apparent reason. Compulsive liars become so good at lying and so used to lying that they may not even know themselves what the truth is.

Instructions

1. Ask the individual who you suspect of lying to retell their story. You can say something along the lines of, "I did not quite understand everything you said. Could you repeat it?" This way you are not putting the storyteller on the defensive. Pay close attention to any discrepancies between the retelling and the original story. When people lie, they are not able to keep track of every detail they said because it is not the truth, so most of the time their telling of the story will be different each time.

2. 

   A liar, when confronted, may become defensive and angry.

   Make mental notes about the person's body language. There are several things that someone does subconsciously when they are lying. Pay attention to whether or not the person you suspect of lying is making eye contact with you, has their body turned away from you or seems uncomfortable. Most liars will not make eye contact when they are lying and will turn their bodies so that they are not parallel to you. They may also demonstrate discomfort by sweating, fidgeting or talking faster than normal.

3. Confront the person you suspect is lying. Once you have determined that the individual is lying to you, or if you are in a relationship with someone who you suspect lies often, ask them about the discrepancies. Compulsive liars often begin the pattern of lying at a young age and the lying has become so normal to them that they may not be able to differentiate between the truth and a lie, even if it is their story. Point out the variations in the story and ask why they will not make eye contact or seem nervous. When dealing with a compulsive liar you will most likely not obtain the truth, and the liar will become defensive and angry. The benefit to confronting them, however, is that you may be able to decide whether or not you can trust the person and if you want that person in your life.

References

• Life Hackery: 6 Ways to Confront a Liar, and How to Confront Them
• Compulsive Lying: A Few Facts About Compulsive Lying
• Truth About Deception: Compulsive Lying
• MHMatters: What is Compulsive Lying?