How to Recover From Heartbreak

Getting over heartbreak takes a proactive approach.

Relationships are complex and require effort to be successful. When your relationship ends, you may feel hurt, confused and angry. Getting over someone you felt close to can be difficult, and even more so if you did not instigate the breakup. It is important to allow yourself time to grieve for the relationship, and you will normally experience a series of emotions: denial, guilt, anger, and acceptance are just a few of the stages of grief you will undergo. You can help speed up the process of getting over heartbreak by taking control of the situation, rather than allowing the situation to control you.

Instructions

Grieve

1. Cut off all contact with your ex. Resist the urge to stay friends, even if your ex suggests it. If you maintain contact with your ex, it will draw out the grieving process and create a stressful and unhealthy situation for you both.

2. Allow yourself a certain amount of time to grieve. It is normal for you to reminisce about the good times you and your ex enjoyed. Permit yourself to feel angry, scared, lonely or whatever feelings arise after the breakup. According to Revolution Health, everyone processes grief differently, and therefore the time it takes for each person is different.

3. Take inventory of the relationship. Make an honest assessment of what worked and what didn't work. Relationships are two-way streets, so do not put all the blame on one person. Recognize your weaknesses and work to improve those.

4. Let go. After you've completed the grieving process, realize that it is time to truly let go of the relationship. Tell yourself it is OK to free yourself from the relationship. You cannot move on or have a healthy relationship again until you truly free yourself from the desire to be with your former partner.

Stay Active

1. Get busy with activities. Do not stay home all the time as this will keep you from letting go and moving on. If you keep your mind occupied, you will have less time to dwell on your failed relationship.

2. Exercise. Exercising your mind and your body is a good mood lifter. Dr. Sudha Prathikanti, M.D, states that consistent physical activity can have the same effects as an antidepressant because your body releases a chemical called serotonin as a result of regular physical exertion.

3. Reconnect with old friends you may have lost contact with during your relationship. Getting back in touch with your old friends can give you a different perspective of your relationship, especially if they have a unique insight into your actions.

Recharge Your Batteries

1. Remove all physical reminders of your ex from your sight. You will dwell less on your ex without physical manifestations of the relationship to remind you.

2. Treat yourself to a massage. Touch is comforting, so allow yourself a ten minute chair massage at the mall, or schedule a day at the spa for a full treatment. Massage is a healthy way to relieve stress and recharge your batteries.

3. Eat a healthier diet. Foods that contain tryptophan and omega-3 fatty acids are natural mood lifters. Take vitamin supplements to ensure you get the appropriate amount of nutrients you need.

Tips & Warnings

• Do not allow your emotions to rule you. Resist the urge to visit or talk to your ex. It will serve no purpose other than to make yourself feel worse.

• Understand your self-worth is not tied to another person. It is perfectly fine for you to be single. Embrace your independence.

• Beware of ambiguous signals your ex gives you, especially when you have not finished the grieving process. Your ex may contact you, giving you a sense of false hope. Be wary and don't get your hopes up.

References

• Revolution Health: 10 Tips to Get You Through a Breakup
• Enotalone.com: Breakups; How to Survive Them