How to Find Love After Divorce

Embracing a new love after a divorce can be very fulfilling.

Lee Borden, a divorce lawyer practicing at the Alabama Law Center, believes that second marriages have a higher divorce rate because of post-divorce relationships that are formed too quickly. To find love after divorce and be able to make it last takes being a better and smarter you.

Instructions

Instructions

1. 

   Journal writing is a positive way to vent your emotions.

   Start a journal. Before you sign up on an interesting dating site or start seeing someone new, take some time to heal. Predetermine that for 30 or 60 consecutive days your going to write down how you feel and how you can remember feeling during your marriage.

2. Assess your good and bad qualities. On one piece of paper write down personal issues that you struggle with. The list should include struggles like: a short temper, excessive money spending, poor communications skills and more. On the second piece of paper write down how these personal issues can hinder you in the future and what role they played in your past. This will give you the chance to see yourself from the perspective of a future love interest.

3. Participate in a support group. Support groups can be formal organizations that meet for the specific purpose of helping you deal with life after divorce. A support group can also be a circle of close friends and family members. The point is to surround yourself with people who can help you enjoy life as a single person. Be sure to meet with your group at least once a week.

4. 

   Your local newspaper is filled with free and inexpensive events.

   Plan on living. Open up your local newspaper and find events that you can go to. Search for outings that you might have avoided but were interested in when you were married. Schedule spa appointments and days to participate in social lessons like dance classes. Plan a vacation to some place you've never been before and be sure to set goals to see particular venues of interest.

5. Meet a friend. Some of the best people in your life, people who love you and you love in return, are your friends. Deciding to meet a friend rather than starting a quest for true love will relieve the pressure that usually comes with dates and new boyfriend/girlfriend relationships.

Tips & Warnings

• Dr. Myles Munroe in his book, "Single, Married, Separated, and Life After Divorce" states, "[a]ll you need to stop being alone is another human being, not a husband or wife." Joining Internet social networks, or catching up with old friends are quick outlets for those times when you feel alone.

• Fill your daily planner with activities and goals. Give yourself the chance to enjoy you, and the pleasures of your life. Remember, if you don't enjoy your company no one else will.

• Boost your confidence and self-esteem daily. If your overweight, start a health plan for getting into shape and celebrate every met milestone. Don't let a single day go by without complimenting yourself.

• Avoid the people in your life who only seem to talk about your love interest or lack there of. Dating just to make your family or friends happy can lead to negative encounters that could tarnish your view on the whole dating experience.

References

• Divorce Mag: Divorce Magazinerce Statistics
• Divorce Info: Rebound Relationships After Divorce
• Single, Married, Separated, and Life After Divorce; Dr. Myles Munroe; 2003