How to Get Out the Door in the Morning with Kids
It can be a real challenge to get to work on time every morning when you have young children. The morning routine seems to take twice as long as it should when you have kids who dawdle, whine or break out into tantrums. A well-structured morning routine can go a long way in reducing morning angst and getting you all where you need to be on time.
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Instructions
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Make sure everyone gets enough sleep. This is a very important part of having a peaceful morning. Children aged 1 to 2 need 12 to 14 hours of sleep each day, including daytime naps. From the ages of 3 to 6, children need 10 to 12 hours. Ages 7 to 12 need 10 to 11 hours of sleep. Grown-ups need enough sleep too. Make sure you are getting eight hours of sleep.
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Establish the tasks that need to be completed and the order in which they should be completed. Examples of these tasks may be: get dressed, brush teeth, wash face, brush hair, eat breakfast. If you have toddler or pre-school children, have the kids draw pictures of the tasks they must complete, cut them out and put them into an order that is acceptable to the family. Older children may like to write down their morning activities. Some tasks may be completed the night before, such as picking out clothes.
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Reward children for getting ready quickly. Absolutely no TV, computer or video games before getting all the critical tasks completed. It is amazing to see how fast kids will get ready to go when they find themselves with extra time to do some fun things before heading out the door.
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Time how long each of the tasks take prior to establishing the routine. Task length will depend on the child's age. For example, a 2-year-old will take longer getting dressed and may need more help than a 4-year-old. Be realistic about how long a morning task actually takes and adjust if conditions change. If you've previously timed 5 minutes for the kids to get shoes and coats on and nine times out of 10 it is actually taking 15 minutes, adjust your schedule. If you notice you are 10 minutes late for work every day, that means you have to get up and start the routines at least 10 minutes earlier.
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Use a timer and keep things moving. Once you have established the amount of time for each task, use an egg timer or stopwatch for each task to provide the kids with a clear begin and end time. This helps the routine be enforced by an inanimate object (the alarm) rather than by you yelling at them. If they don't complete the task on time, move on to the next task. Kids may get frustrated when they have to skip a step, but in time and with practice they will learn that the routine moves on without them so they need to keep up. You may be able to drop the timer once the routine is well established, though you may find it handy to continue to set an alarm that signals time for shoes and coats.
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Use one or two word commands and try to avoid repeating yourself. Say to the children, "Brush teeth!" and start the timer. Simple means easier for children to understand. Saying it once means they must learn good listening skills, which is a skill for life.
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Stay neutral and empathetic when children are resistant to following the routine. Give children the opportunity to take responsibility for their own actions. For example, "That is too bad, you are not dressed and we are walking out the door now. Oh well, I guess you will have to get dressed at daycare. So sad!" Pack their clothes and carry them out the door if you must. It won't take long for them to learn how to avoid unpleasant consequences for themselves.
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Tips & Warnings
Be sure to communicate with your children about the new routine that you will be starting. Get them involved in the planning.
Try doing a dry run of your new routine on the weekend before it really counts.
Don't argue with kids who are screaming, crying or whining. One or two word, repetitious responses such as, "Oh" or "Hmmm" or "That is so sad," are good ways to show you are listening and empathizing but not being emotionally pulled in or giving in to their demands.
It is hard sometimes to avoid having your buttons pushed by your kids, but it is important to be mindful of anger that arises and stay as neutral as possible in your responses.
Be consistent. Kids will quickly learn that you mean business and that it is in their power to avoid unpleasant consequences.
If you adjust your wake time to an earlier time, don't let your routine slip because you think you have extra time. In other words, don't hit the snooze button on any part of the morning routine.
References
- Photo Credit kids smiling image by sonya etchison from Fotolia.com
