How to Find Adopted Family Members

Finding an adopted family member can be stressful, yet worth it.

When you are looking for a family member who was adopted, the search can be overwhelming and frustrating. Knowing where to start looking and how to begin is the hardest step. Once the process is in motion, joining a support group can help you deal with any feelings that you may be having and can also help you should the process stall along the way.

Instructions

1. Gather as many facts as you can about the adoption. Ask other family members what, if anything, they can remember. Adoption dates, birth dates, the hospital that the adopted family member was born at, the doctor that delivered, and the name of the adoption agency that the family worked with are all important pieces of information that can lead you to find your relative.

2. Contact the state or the county where the adoption became finalized. Start with the office of vital records and they can refer you to the state or county agency, if any that can help you. If there is no agency specifically for adoption information, the office of vital statistics can assist you. Ask them to give you information from the birth that is non-identifying. That is information such as eye color and hair color. Also ask them to contact you if your child searches for you. While you may not be able to access your files, they can flag them to reflect your request.

3. Sign up with adoption registries. The oldest and largest registry is the Soundex Reunion Registry. Registration is free for Soundex, but is not available online. Sign up for as many adoption registries that you can.

4. Join an adoption support group. They can offer emotional assistance, but they can also give you advice or discuss new ways to search for the adopted family member.

5. Call the county or state where the adoption was performed to ask if they have a confidential intermediary assistance program. This is a program that will help to search official records with consent from the adopted person. There may be a small fee for this program in your area.

References

• Internation Soundex Reunion Registry
• Adoption Registry