Fighting for Child Custody
A divorce is one of the most stressful events in life, ranking just below the death of a spouse. It is important to keep the best interests of your child in mind during the emotional turmoil. Fighting to stay in your child’s life is necessary for yourself and for your child. While there is no guarantee for winning a custody case, you can do things to improve your chances.
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Things You'll Need
- Computer
- Printer
- Internet Access
- Lawyer
- Phone recording device
- Paper
- Envelopes
- Stamps
- Pens
Instructions
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Contact the local Family Court clerk to get a copy of the guidelines for parents. It is important to know your rights as a parent and the standards that apply in your state. Non-custodial parents generally spend every other weekend and one midweek evening with their child. If you want more time than that with your child, you must ask for it.
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Consult a lawyer. There is no substitute for experience. A lawyer will know more about family law and the judge who oversees your divorce and custody case than you. Ask around for the best lawyer. Talk to friends and family members in the area and find a lawyer who is versed in parental rights cases. Review listings and profiles maintained by your local Bar Association.
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Establish a custodial standard. Everything you do has an impact on the future. Judges are unlikely to change an already set pattern of custody. Do not move out of the house until the judge has set custody. That will change the “established custodial environment” and can directly affect which parent receives primary custody of your child.
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Document all correspondence between you and the other parent. This includes phone, email and postal mail. Send all postal mail certified with a return receipt in case the other parent claims he never received the mail. If using email, use the read receipt function or sites like whoreadme.com to track the receipt of your email by the other parent. Should he refuse to communicate in writing, use phone recording devices or soundfeelings.com to download and save voice mail messages from your cell phone. Be aware some states require you to have the other party's permission before recording a conversation, whether in person or by phone.
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Track all time spent with your child. Use an Excel spreadsheet or a daily planner and write down activities, interactions, and even meals. Keep track of the people you interact with during those times and detailed receipts of meals out. In high-conflict divorce cases, it is not uncommon for accusations of all sorts to be levied against a parent, including accusations of deliberate exposure to allergens or claims of abuse.
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Introduce yourself to collateral contacts. These include teachers, coaches, Scout leaders, and doctors. This helps establish that you are an active and involved parent who knows your child, is aware of your child’s preferences, and has a prominent role in your child’s life. In many cases, schools and doctor’s offices will not want to get involved. You do have legal rights to your child’s medical records and school records. However, be cautious about invoking those legal rights until you have exhausted more friendly avenues.
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References
- Photo Credit father and son at holiday image by .shock from Fotolia.com
