How to Write an Obituary for a Teenage Son

Obituaries for teenagers are especially tough, particularly if the teenager is your own son.

Obituaries are short articles that note the death of an individual. Obituaries appear in local newspapers and sometimes in online publications. They may be written by the funeral home, but many funeral homes allow the family to write the obituary if they choose to do so. Writing an obituary is never easy. Obituaries for teenagers are especially tough, particularly if the teenager is your own son. However painful as the process may be, writing this important obituary is a way to honor your child and to remember his life and his contribution to his world.

Instructions

1. Think through your child's life. Consider what information you want to include in his obituary. You may wish to consult with immediate family members and gain their input.

2. Write the first sentence. State the teenager's full name and his age at time of death. If he used a nickname by which people know him, include it. Then state the town in which he lived and choose how you wish to state his passing (died, passed on, etc.). Then state the date of passing. A typical first sentence might be "Robert (Bobbie) Doe, 16, of Smalltown, OH, passed away on Friday, June 5, 2010."

3. List the names of the teenager's immediate family and indicate their relationship to him. For example, you may say, "Bobbie is survived by his parents Mary & John Doe, sister Ellen and Grandparents Rob & Sue Smith and Jean & Bill Doe." Always list the parents' and grandparents' last names so that friends and colleagues who may not have known the child will be able to identify the parent or grandparent. Families also often include a list of other family members such as "He is also survived by aunts, uncles and cousins."

4. Give a bit of background on the teen. List clubs, sports, activities and volunteer organizations in which he participated. Give the name of the school he attended and list his academic or other accomplishments or awards.

5. Tell readers how they may pay respects. Give time, date and place information about viewings, wakes, funeral and memorial services, and the burial. If the family is requesting donations in lieu of flowers, indicate where donations may be made and to what cause.

Tips & Warnings

• Remember that newspapers usually charge to print obituaries and may have length restrictions. Check with your local publication for fees and restrictions.

• If you are not facing length restrictions, consider adding a few lines about your son's personality, strengths and gifts. You may even consider including a line from a favorite movie, book or poem if the teen had one. This can be a nice way to show people a bit of his personality.

• Consider the matter seriously before including cause of death information. This can be painful and some papers will not print cause of death. However, if it is important to the family, include it, but be aware that the newspaper may edit this information out.

References

• Partnership for Parents: Obituaries
• Operation Stop: Obituaries