How to Fix a Relationship With Your Girlfriend
Most people don't realize how much effort it takes to make a relationship work. Both partners must give and take equally so each can feel loved. If you and your girlfriend have been drifting apart recently--for whatever reason--you can work to make things right, but you'll both have to work at it. Flowers and jewelry only go so far to say, "I'm sorry." Real change must come from within.
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Instructions
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Identify the major problems in your relationship. Some relationships turn sour due to a specific action, such as the break in trust that comes with cheating. Others simply drift apart due to lack of communication. Before you can start to fix your relationship with your girlfriend, you need to determine where things are going wrong.
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Open the lines of communication. Let your girlfriend know that you want to work things out and you are willing to talk about your problems. Take the first step and share your feelings about the relationship and where you hope it can go. Let her know that you want her to do the same. Listen to her. Remember one of the most important parts of communication is listening.
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Eliminate negative speech patterns. Couples often use language that comes off as accusatory. Get rid of the blame. Instead, focus on sharing your feelings. Instead of complaining that "she's never around," tell her that you "feel lonely" when you don't get to see her often.
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Recognize your emotional vulnerability. Most people have a need to feel loved and wanted. You don't need to feel ashamed about this.
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Fix yourself to fix your relationship. It's easy to place blame on the other person in the relationship. Stop thinking about the ways that she should change to make the relationship better and start thinking about the ways that you can change. For example, you can start making more time for her, volunteer to do the dishes or help with other household chores; take an interest in her hobbies. These little things can make a big difference.
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Tips & Warnings
Relationships are a two-way street. You shouldn't have to completely change yourself in order to stay with your girlfriend. Sure, you may need to compromise, but she needs to bend, too. Some relationships simply aren't a good match no matter how much work you put into it.
References
- Photo Credit romance image by Mat Hayward from Fotolia.com
