How to Accept That Your Teenage Daughter Is Dating an Older Guy
Parenting teenagers is stressful and troubling as your children start to feel like adults even if they aren't yet. As teens get older, they have more latitude and choice in what they do, but that doesn't mean you, as a parent, are out of the picture. It can be hard to accept your daughter dating an older guy, but there are ways to learn to deal with and manage it without smothering your daughter or overreacting. Depending on your daughter's age and maturity level, there may be a comfort zone you can agree on.
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Instructions
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Talk to your daughter about dating when she enters high school or sooner, depending on your personal preferences. When you decide she is old enough to start dating, don't scare her or be overbearing; rather, encourage her to tell you about any potential boyfriends and ask to meet them before she goes out with them.
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Set a curfew for your daughter that you are comfortable with and require check-ins to make sure she is not lying about her location or date. Make other rules as you see fit about where she can go with this older guy and what she is allowed to do, clearly setting out punishments for breaking these rules. Remember, teenagers are naturally rebellious, so try to be as open-minded as possible. Disney Family states that teens under 17 should not date anyone more than two years older than them, but that may not always be the case, depending on your daughter's age and maturity.
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Meet your daughter's potential older boyfriends so you can get to know him. Ask him questions about where he lives, what he does and what he likes. This may put you at ease. Also, meeting him shows him that you have an active role in your daughter's life. Get his phone number, address and parental contact information if you like.
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Monitor and observe your daughter's dating activity. Enforce your curfews and rules, doling out agreed-upon punishments like grounding, suspended driving privileges or cell phone suspension if she breaks your agreements.
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Remember that your daughter is growing up and can make some choices on her own. You can only do so much as a parent. Showing you care and have an interest in her life are more important than you think. Even if she seems unhappy with your rules, she will thank you later in life.
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Tips & Warnings
If your teen daughter is dating someone over 18 years old and you believe they are having sexual relations, contact your local police department, as statutory rape laws vary in different states.
References
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