How to Develop Active Listening Skills
We remember about 25 to 50 percent of what we hear; when you talk to your boss or spouse for 10 minutes, you really hear only two to five minutes of the conversation. Become an active listener to retain more information, which will improve your job performance and your relationships. Active listening involves a conscious effort to understand, interpret and evaluate a message.
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Instructions
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Steps in Active Listening
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Pay attention. Look at the speaker and maintain eye contact. Avoid environmental distractions like computers, television and other conversations. Put aside distracting thoughts--don't mentally prepare a rebuttal even if you don't agree with what the speaker says. Take notes or try repeating the speaker's words mentally to help you concentrate. These actions reinforce the message and keep your mind from drifting.
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Listen for the speaker's feelings as well as her facts. If there's an emotional tone to the message, listening to words alone will result in an incomplete message. Watch the person's body language and listen to what the person doesn't say--what a speaker omits can speak volumes about his message.
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Use both verbal and nonverbal cues to show that you're listening. Smile, nod and use facial expressions to convey your interest. Say "yes" or "uh huh" to indicate you're paying attention. even if you don't agree with the speaker. Ask questions to show interest or to clarify points. Use these cues to show respect for the speaker and to remind yourself to pay attention.
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Constantly summarize what the speaker says and and repeat the key points mentally. In a professional situation, relate what your boss or colleague is saying to current policies or procedures; in a personal scenario, connect the message to previous actions and conversations. Associated information is easier to understand and remember. Don't interrupt the speaker or prepare a retort, but make notes of what points require a response.
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Provide feedback. Respond with candor and openness; state your opinions, but don't make judgments. An effective listener transitions smoothly from speaker to listener and back to speaker, so after you've provided feedback, be respectful and allow the speaker to respond to you.
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Tips & Warnings
Review your notes while you listen to a speaker to help you remember the key points.
We all have prejudices that affect the way we interpret information. To be a good active listener, listen to information objectively first and then evaluate it according to your beliefs. Allowing prejudice to intrude upon the listening process distorts a message's meaning.
