How to Become a Master of Understanding Body Language
Mastering the understanding of body language takes years of observation and practice. Most people know more than they think, however. Humans spend a lifetime sending and receiving non-verbal clues. Interpreting these is instinctive and largely subconscious, because survival of the species is at stake. For example, mating rituals and the care of infants depend largely on non-verbal communication. Mastering the art of understanding body language by deliberate practice and training can produce results akin to mind reading.
Instructions
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Observe Mannerisms
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Look at posture. According to Kevin Hogan in his book, "The Secret Language of Business," the overall position of the head, shoulders, arms, hips and legs can not only influence first impressions but create alliances or discourage attention. When two people interact and their posture is mirrored, meaning they are standing or sitting face-to-face in the same way, it is clear that they like and understand each other.
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Watch the hands. In ancient times, it was common for men to greet with shoves, each trying to place their hands higher on the other's body and thus show dominance. Hence the expression, "getting the upper hand." Today, when two people shake hands, the more dominant is uppermost and has the palm turned slightly downward. When couples hold hands, or a parent clasps a child's hand, dominance is demonstrated by the person whose hand is in front with the palm facing behind them.
Hogan writes that a person standing less than six feet away with palms facing forward or up is open, curious, interested in and inviting further communication. Their hand position indicates a willingness to be vulnerable. -
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Decipher leg movements. Gregory Harley and Marilyn Karinch explain in "The Body Language Handbook" that crossing the legs can signal emphasis or cockiness in men, unless in their culture this is a relaxed stance. Women in high heels, however, make a definite power statement by sitting with legs crossed and a heel aimed assertively. When legs are clenched or tensed they indicate a barrier to further involvement.
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Find out from the eyes. Hogan asserts that the best way to tell if someone is lying is to know them well in order to note changes in their usual eye movements. Just as some people are left-handed, some have reversed eye directions. But most people will look up and to the right when trying to remember facts and up and to the left when engaging in fantasies. Try this out by asking questions such as, "What were you wearing yesterday?"
Furthermore, when a person is having an inner language dialogue, the eyes will move down to the right. When feelings are paramount the eyes more often move down and left. Eyes that turn straight down signal embarrassment. Direct, prolonged eye contact might be a sign of intimidation or distrust. Normal eye contact is sporadic and natural. Look for consistency as a sign of sincerity.
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