How to Manage that Anger Today
We all experience anger in a different way. We also have different anger triggers. However, regardless of how we experience anger, it can problems at times. A healthy level of anger can help us to take appropriate actions and solve problems, but too much anger can destroy us.
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Instructions
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The first step to managing your anger is to maintain a notebook where you write down each time you get angry and what the trigger was. This will help you identify your triggers and be in a much better position to deal with them. It will also enable you to critically evaluate if you get mad a whole lot or have an anger management problem.
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The next step is to review the log you wrote and observe if it appears that you have an anger management problem. If so, determine if it is hurting your chances of success.
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Now talk with the people who are important to you about your anger. They can be a fantastic source of support and motivation in your goals. They also can give you a heads up when they see that you are starting to go to that dark place.
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The next thing is to always think about how you feel. When you feel that you are beginning to become angry, pause, take deep breaths, give yourself some positive reinforcement, tell yourself that you can handle any situation and end the negative thoughts.
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Now when you run into a person that is one of your triggers, try to put yourself in his shoes. Try to see the situation from his perspective and remind yourself to be objective and realize that no one is perfect. This is the time to remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes.
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Next, take the time to smile. Just the effort to smile will naturally relax you and make you feel better. It will help you calm down so you can determine if there is a reason to be upset. Then try to laugh a real heartfelt laugh. This will calm your muscles and help you relax. When you relax you may decide that there really was nothing to get so uptight about.
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Stop and listen to what you are taking in or what someone is saying to you. Many times, miscommunication contributes to misunderstanding, frustration and then anger. Try to listen to other's perspective to see where they are coming from and to identify why their point of view is or is not in conflict to yours.
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Live every day as if it is the last day you have. This means thinking about the situations and asking yourself if something is this really worth getting angry about.
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Forgive those who hurt you. Do not forget because then you open yourself up too much, but forgive so you do not hold on to the anger.
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