How to Comfort The Bereaved
The loss of a loved one is a devastating trauma. Unfortunately, at some point, everybody will suffer loss and experience grief. If you want to help a bereaved person, show compassion and understanding. Your comfort will bring a small measure of solace during a very dark and painful time.
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Instructions
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Get books from a library or bookstore to broaden your understanding of the complexities of grief. In order to help the bereaved, you need to be aware of the many ways grief can manifest, such as through anger or extreme crying.
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Show the bereaved person that you care. Tell him you are sorry for his loss and give him a sympathy card expressing your sorrow. Just knowing that he is not alone will help. But be careful. Do not offer him platitudes, saying you know how he feels or time will heal everything.
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Share and listen to stories about the deceased. If you knew the deceased, share a funny story with the bereaved person. You must also encourage the bereaved person to tell stories. She needs to talk about the person she lost, so do not make her feel uncomfortable or discourage her from telling stories, even if she tells the same story every time you see her.
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Create a safe space in which the bereaved person can cry or yell. He needs to get his emotions out, and you must not judge him. Never tell the bereaved person to stop crying or to simply get over his grief. He cannot move on with his life if he is not allowed to express his feelings. Sit quietly and offer comfort by holding his hand or giving him a hug.
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Suggest that the bereaved person create a memorial and participate, such as by helping her to plant a tree in honor of the deceased or making a scrapbook of photos and mementos. You can even help the bereaved to set up a table in her home with photos and mementos. Think of items to put on the table, such as a lock of hair, pictures, jewelry or even a poem that was written in honor of the deceased.
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Tips & Warnings
Contact a health professional if the bereaved person becomes depressed and talks about suicide.
References
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