How to Deal With Teen Trust Issues
Mistrust is a common problem plaguing the often volatile relationships between teenagers and their parents. Some parents dread the onset of teenage years as much as the "terrible twos." You may find yourself feeling apprehensive as your child approaches adolescence. If this is the case, familiarize yourself with steps that you can continuously take to increase the trust between you and your teenage son or daughter. Doing so can help you build a stronger, more meaningful relationship.
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Instructions
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Establish an open line of communication in which both parties are able to freely express themselves. Listen to your teen without judgment and pay attention to her questions and opinions. Acknowledging and addressing your teen's feelings will allow her to view you as someone whom she can go to for support and/or information, as opposed to an adversary.
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Be proactive in participating in your teen's life. Take a genuine interest in their social life, academic performance and other areas of their life.
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Recognize the fine line between healthy, active involvement in your teen's life and invasion of privacy. Unless you have legitimate concerns about your child's safety, do not snoop through his computer files or read the text messages on his phone. Avoid creating the impression that you are constantly spying on your teen, which can foster immense mistrust. Agree in advance on the times when you expect your son to call and check in while out with friends instead of calling him incessantly during the outing.
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Build trust by increasing your teen's privileges in exchange for following rules. For instance, extend your daughter's curfew if she continuously returns home when expected. Make it clear from the beginning that respecting the rules will lead to reward. Mutual trust will grow when both you and your teen keep your word -- even if doing so is not related to a reward. Following through on your promise to drive your daughter to the mall or help your son on a school project will develop the child's confidence in your trustworthiness.
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Do not walk away from a situation involving your teen as a result of frustration. Your daughter will trust you more if she knows that she can count on you and that you are committed to working things out.
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Emphasize to your teen that trust is an essential component of strong, rewarding relationships, both personal and professional, throughout life.
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Tips & Warnings
Exceptions to not passing judgment or invading your teen's privacy include situations in which your teen has indicated that he or someone else is in danger.
