How to Help a Shy or Fearful Dog Learn to Trust You

You are meeting an unfamiliar dog and you observe behaviors such as tucking his tail between his legs, crouching low to the ground, backing away, avoiding eye contact and possibly rolling over on his back. All of these (and others) are doggie language for "I'm shy or scared". Here are some tips to approaching this dog in the least threatening way possible.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Tasty treats if possible, even hot dog or cheese bits.
• Patience
• Understanding dog body language

1. Dogs have a body language of their own. If a new dog is crouching and avoiding eye contact, but not making any directly fear aggressive behaviors towards you (i.e. growling, snarling or lunging), it is probably okay to take the following steps to help him learn to trust you.

2. Approach the dog slowly in a curved fashion, rather than walking directly towards him. Sit or crouch close to the ground sideways to the dog, trying to gauge a distance from him where he feels safe. Do not make direct eye contact. Dogs have a variety of self-calming behaviors; try to imitate these if you can. Dogs that turn their heads away, yawn and/or lick their lips are trying to calm themselves down.

3. Continue to sit quietly, avoid eye contact and yawn several times. Do not reach out to the dog, but rather, let him approach you. If you have treats, you might gently toss some in his general direction, starting at a distance and gradually putting the treats down closer to you...if you have the patience to sit quietly for a while, most dogs will begin to follow the treat trail towards you. Speak softly and gently to him while you are providing treats, telling him what a good and handsome dog he is.

4. Once the dog has begun approaching you, put a treat in the palm of your hand or lay it on the ground near you and see if he will take it from you. Do not make any sudden movements, and be prepared to start all over again if he gets spooked and backs away. Once he is near and seems to be calming down, you can slowly reach the back of your hand towards him, and if he sniffs and doesn't back away, slowly stroke his side while continuing to speak softly to him.

5. Until a dog trusts you, actions on your part such as towering over him, approaching him head on, staring into his eyes, hugging him around the neck, or even trying to pet him on top of the head may be seen as very threatening and dominant actions towards him. But, if you take your time, observe his actions and behaviors and calmly introduce yourself in a non-threatening manner, most dogs will learn to trust you.

Tips & Warnings

• In extreme cases, such as under-socialized dogs and dogs rescued from puppy mill situations, getting your dog to trust you may take days or weeks, and you will need to continue to approach him, or let him approach you, in a non-threatening manner.
• Let the dog set the pace and if he is not responding at first, back away, give him some space and try again later.
• There is a wonderful, short book by trainer Turid Rugaas called "On Talking Terms With Dogs...Calming Signals" that can be extremely helpful.
• You should NOT try these steps if a fearful dog is also displaying aggressive behavior such as snarling, growling and lunging towards you.
• You should seek the help of a professional trainer or behaviorist if the shy dog is your own and you are not making progress within a few days.

[kellylynnmarie]

on 10/29/2009 GREAT TIPS! THANKS FOR SHARING!

[weazelgrl]

on 10/15/2009 These are things we had to do for the dogs rescued from the local puppy mill. They had never been around people before and were terrified. Very good advice for the fearful dog.

[jaredbangerter]

on 10/13/2009 It definitely takes time and the techniques you recommended in here to develop a strong relationship with a dog. Great article. 5* and rec

[kinderhook]

on 10/13/2009 Well written article on helping a fearful dog trust you. Rings true. If possible, you might also let the shy dog observe you (calm) with another dog that he knows. Takes time, but is well worth the effort. 5*