How to Find Out If Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend Is Cheating

Sometimes, even the ones we trust the most will let us down. Do things seem different? Do you suspect that the one you love may be spending their time with someone else? While, short of a direct confession or catching them in the act, there are few real ways to prove infidelity, following these steps will give you a better idea of what to look for, questions to ask, and how to deal with the feeling that your boyfriend or girlfriend is cheating.

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• An inquisitive, yet fair mind

1. 

   Ask. It seems too simple, but often, many people in relationships live secretly in misery, consumed by thoughts of the possible actions of their partner, and never bother to even ask. Sure, if they are cheating, they probably won’t tell you, but it’s not the answer itself that you are looking for. It is how your boyfriend or girlfriend responds to inquisition that can give you the best idea of their level of commitment.
   
   Do they give you a simply, assuring “no.” Or do they get defensive, ask why you want to know, or say or do something equally as unsettling? Do they seem genuinely concerned by your concern, or are they angry, argumentative? Think about how you would respond, and how you would expect your partner to respond to a similar line of questioning based on what you know about them. If their responses seem inappropriate or out of character, then maybe they are hiding something from you.

2. Observe. Has your boyfriend or girlfriend’s attitude towards you or the relationship changed without explanation? Has the amount of time they spend with you or their availability to communicate with you decreased unexplainably? Are they doing things differently? Changes in their behavior can indicate changes in their feelings as well as changes in your relationship. This may mean that it is time for you to make some changes of your own!

3. Go with your gut! Even if they answer your questions sufficiently and seem to have valid reasons for changes in behavior and attitude, if something still just doesn’t “feel,” right, then things between the two of you just aren’t right. Even if you cannot prove anything, there is no point in being unhappy and constantly feeling unsure of both yourself and your relationship.

4. 

   If you have made the effort to confirm or deny your suspicions, you probably have either had them relinquished, affirmed, or neither and you are still left with a lack of confidence in your partner’s fidelity and the status of your relationship. No one can make your relationship decisions for you, but if you have inquired and still feel no better about the condition of your relationship, maybe it is time to make some changes. With all of the social networking, dating and relationship websites available, there is no excuse to continue with uncertainty. Keep an eye on your options and do not discredit yourself; if your boyfriend or girlfriend is cheating, it is not your fault!

Tips & Warnings

• There are lots of factors to consider when in a relationship, so while these steps may ease the burden of some, they may not apply as easily to others.