How to Process Your Birth Experience
Processing your birth experience, whether good or bad, is important and normal. You will inevitably have questions about the process. You may want to know what could have been different or what you could have changed. You may feel an influx of emotions. Allow yourself as long as you need to do this. It's normal and natural, and overall healing.
Other People Are Reading
Instructions
-
-
1
Don't expect anything. Expecting to feel or not to feel certain emotions can be a letdown. Don't have any expectations during this postpartum period.
-
2
Allow yourself to feel. Whether your emotions are angry, sad, helpless or happy, just allow yourself to feel them. You don't have to make sense of them or figure it all out; just know that it's normal and healthy to go through this process.
-
-
3
Allow yourself to grieve. If you had a less than optimal experience, allow yourself to cry and grieve. There is no particular rule for having an optimal birth experience. Some mothers with vaginal births are highly disappointed and other mothers who have cesareans are happy. Your feelings are individual and not wrong.
-
4
Discuss your emotions with your care provider or partner. Talking about your birth story and your feelings may help you process the experience. Sometimes, just getting someone's different view on things can be enlightening and uplifting.
-
5
Write down particular questions that come up, so you can process them and come back to them later if need be. Some of the questions may be for your provider to answer. Just make a note of them.
-
6
Ask for clarity from your provider. If you have questions that come up and you can't seem to get them resolved in your own mind, ask your provider for clarity. If she did something that you didn't understand, ask why. This is important for your own peace of mind and healing process.
-
7
Focus on the positive aspect of bonding with your baby. Sure, it's normal to go through the grieving process for however long you need to, but also focus on your baby and the good that you have in your arms.
-
1
Tips & Warnings
If your process turns into postpartum depression, seek outside sources to help.
More Like This
Comments
-
Mitzi Saltsman
Sep 30, 2009
I was surprised at the birth of my first child, by the the intense memories of a baby niece who had died of cancer. There are often unexpected feeling that come up and processing them would be better than supressing them. Thanks.
