How to Wear Lingerie With Confidence

Many women cringe at the thought of wearing sexy lingerie for their husbands. This goes double for those of us who are "plus size". We all know that men are visual creatures, and we all want to be the "vision" our husbands are looking at. You don't have to have a perfect body to look great in lingerie. Learn how to wear lingerie your husband will love and feel beautiful, confident, and sexy beyond your wildest dreams(and his!)

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Instructions

1. Choose where to shop for your intimate apparel. If you are not comfortable shopping for lingerie at a store, shop online. If you are plus sized or if you do not live in a large city you may want to shop online anyway, as your selection will be limited in the local stores. Do not let your husband pick it out for you, at least not until you are sure he has a clear idea of what you like, and he knows how to get the correct size. It can be fun to pick it out together, but do not allow him to talk you into something you know will not flatter you, or that you will never feel confident in. If you don't love how you look and feel in it, he won't either, even if he loves it on the mannequin. Never forget, confidence is a huge part of attraction.

2. Consider your choices. It is beyond the scope of this article to go over all the many different types of lingerie. The main thing to consider is that there is a type of lingerie that flatters your unique shape, so don't be discouraged if you are less than thrilled with how you look in the first few things you try. It takes a while to find your lingerie style, just as it does with all types of apparel. Sometimes, what looks and feels best on you, may not even be something you even considered wearing originally. Be flexible and open-minded with regard to your choices. For example, many women shy away from attire such as ultra revealing body stockings, when the reality is they can actually flatter many body types. Have fun with the process, it will add to your sense of adventure.

3. Try it on. If you've gotten this far, and now you've got a pile of silky, barely there, see through, peek-a-boo, frilly little things in front of you, you deserve a pat on the back. Good for you for getting through that part. Now keep your confidence up as you take an objective look at yourself in them. Never try your lingerie on for the first time right before you plan to show it off. It's too much pressure for most of us, give yourself time to prepare. As you look at yourself in each item, remember your target audience. Chances are, your husband is not going to be looking at you with the same critical eye that you look at yourself. He loves you. He loves the body that you have. He knows it's not perfect and he doesn't care. He just wants to see you beaming with confidence in the full knowledge that you are beautiful to him, and you know it! Take stock of your assets, this is definitely one time that you want them on display!

4. Don't forget the accessories. As we women know, no outfit is complete without them, and this doubly true of your lingerie ensemble! Remember back to when you were a little girl playing dress up? This is the ultimate fantasy dress-up game. Consider jewelry, hairstyle, gloves, feather boa, shoes (high heeled, of course!). We an call be divas in the bedroom! Fragrance can be a nice touch, but be sure not to overdo it, as you will be very close. With regard to makeup, definitely play up the eyes. Be careful with lipstick though, if you wear any at all consider a lip gloss that tastes good.

5. Set the stage. In order to feel like the beautiful, sexy, feminine, creature that you are, you need to make your environment a pleasant an relaxing place for the two of you. Give yourself plenty of time to accomplish this. Rushing around at the last minute is unlikely to put you in the mood. Make the bed with fresh linens, tidy the room, take the laundry to the laundry room. Now, think about what to add. Flowers are a nice romantic touch. Music can help set the mood. Just make it the best it can be so you will be relaxed, and ready to have fun without being distracted by the clutter, etc.

6. Turn your attention to the lighting. The right lighting is essential to looking and feeling you best in your lingerie. Find the lighting that is flattering to you. You may consider candle light, colored lightbulbs, or other soft romantic lighting. Also, consider natural light. Just make sure you will be seen in your best light for your lingerie debut!

7. Show time! Okay you've followed the above steps, now everything is ready, but you're still a little nervous, right? It's time to give yourself a pep talk. Remember this from step three (it's worth repeating): "Your husband is not going to be looking at you with the same critical eye that you look at yourself. He loves you. He loves the body that you have. He knows it's not perfect and he doesn't care. He just wants to see you beaming with confidence in the full knowledge that you are beautiful to him, and you know it!" Keep repeating these words to yourself until you believe them. Then when you are ready, put on those high heels and watch your husband's face light up as you enter the room!

[DragonLilly]

on 9/27/2009 Great article and insightful advice...thanks!