Things You'll Need:
- Counselor
- Self-Help Books
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Step 1
Make sure that you and your spouse are truly done and over with the marriage. As Dr. Phil says, if there are still feelings there, try to work it out with a counselor. Question what your role is given the problems in your marriage.
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Step 2
Seek psychological help in making the transition to separate lives. The children need to be heard and seeing a counselor is a way of allowing the children to speak without getting angry with them. Children are going to feel a variety of feelings during a divorce. It is important to allow them to voice their opinions.
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Step 3
Your state might make it mandatory, but seek out a class about divorce. It will be much easier if you and your ex-spouse are on the same page. I know this is probably difficult and there are many hurt feelings, but do it for the children!
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Step 4
Do not involve the children in events that should only involve you and your ex. Children do not need to hear adult conversations or you talking badly about your spouse. Make a commitment with each other not to speak badly of each other in front of the children. Be on the same level if at all possible. Try to make rules that work for the both of you. The more you can be on the same page, the safer the children will feel.
