How to Deal With the Pain of Divorce

Mourning

More than half of married Americans will suffer a divorce during their lives. With divorce comes grieving and pain. Even if you know that divorce was the right option for you, you may still feel a profound sense of loss.

Instructions

1. Allow yourself to grieve. Even if you cannot stand your former spouse, you are still experiencing the loss of your marriage. It is normal to feel sad.

2. Find support. Your friends and family will hopefully support for you during this difficult time, but you may try looking for addition support as well. Find a support group.

3. Seek counseling. Find a good therapist and attend at least a few sessions. Your therapist can help you through the grief process and help you take a look at your behavior patterns that may affect future relationships.

4. Take care of yourself by eating healthy meals, getting plenty of sleep and exercising daily.

5. Avoid drugs and alcohol. Self-medicating with these substances is not only harmful, it delays the inevitable grieving process.

6. Learn to feel comfortable being alone. Take some time before dating to remember who you are and what you like when you are not attached to someone else.

7. Write about your feelings. Keep a notebook or journal of your thoughts. Writing can be therapeutic.

8. Explore new activities. Take up a hobby or travel somewhere you have always wanted to go. You may make new friends along the way.

9. Visit your doctor and get a checkup. Many people have trouble sleeping or suffer from situational depression during a divorce. Your doctor will give you advice and treat you for any medical conditions that you have that are causing problems.

10. Look through old photo albums if it helps you to move on. For some people, this just opens old wounds. For others, it allows happy memories to take the place of sadness.

11. Indulge yourself a little. Have a massage or a manicure. Shop for a new wardrobe.

Tips & Warnings

• It takes most people two or three years to fully recover from divorce.

• Avoid making large purchases right after your divorce. Using shopping as a way to feel better can be detrimental to your wallet. Start dating when you feel you are ready, but avoid serious relationships for awhile.

References

• Divorce Statistics and Trends
• Divorce Statistics and Studies Blog