How to Tell if You Are Heading Toward an Emotional Affair With a Co-Worker

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By susansboneyard
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Article Rating: (5 Ratings)

Affairs have long been defined as engaging in a sexual relationship outside of the confines of marriage. While fidelity certainly includes refraining from any physical contact with another person other than your spouse, inappropriate emotional ties can be even more devastating to the marriage. The workplace is a hotbed for these type of relationships, even deserving of a new term ~ office spouse. Ask yourself these questions to determine if you might be transferring your emotions to a co-worker that rightfully belong to your husband or wife.

Difficulty: Challenging

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

honesty with yourself
honesty with your spouse
introspection

Step 1

Do you find yourself spending most of your breaks and lunches with your co-worker? If you are alone a lot with your co-worker, you are only asking for trouble. Some experts suggest that for a healthy marriage to survive, one should NEVER be alone with a member of the opposite sex. Groups are a safer bet.
Step 2

Do you compare your co-worker to your partner? Do you find yourself criticizing your spouse more often than usual? Many times we may be attracted to qualities in which we believe our spouse is lacking. Do you find yourself saying to your spouse, "Get a sense of humor." "Why don't you....?" or "How come you never...?"
Step 3

Do you e-mail, text message or make cell phone calls to your co-worker when not at the workplace? Do you find yourself giving an inordinate amount of time thinking about this person?
Step 4

Have you told your spouse about the e-mails, text messages and phone calls to your co-worker or are you contacting your friend secretly? Do you lie to your spouse if he gets suspicious?
Step 5

Do you find yourself coming up with ways to be with your co-worker outside of the workplace even if it involves an activity with your spouse or family?
Step 6

Do you find yourself confiding in your co-worker about personal matters? Are you critical of or complain about your spouse to your workplace friend? If you have answered yes to many of these questions, you are probably in the danger zone for having an emotional affair. Too much is at stake. Take stock of yourself, your marriage, and your family. You may have some real challenges to overcome.

Comments

beautyqueen26 said

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on 9/23/2009 Wow! You hit the nail right on the head. So many people are guilty of having the emotional affair long before the actual physical affair begins. I've heard that 'emotional affairs' are the number one reason men cheat on their spouse. It's not just finding a person that's more beautiful, but making an intense emotion connection with a non-spouse. And, that's so sad. Cause the spouse is the person you promised to have that connection with. I hope your article will be a wake up call to many who are spiraling out of control in the direction of emotional adultery.

Five stars! And, a recommendation.