How to Recognize a Player

In today's society, there are a lot of players out there. Whether it is a man or a woman, you need to be prepared to deal with them. Players effect anyone from a teenager to a senior citizen. In my "How-To", I will be dealing with the problem of male players. I will try and help women of all ages recognize the signs of a player.

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Instructions

1. When meeting a man, always notice his body language and facial expressions. A player has a hard time focusing on one woman. His eyes usually wonder when a pretty woman passes by. A more experienced player knows how to charm a woman and give her his undivided attention.

2. Before committing to a date, make sure you know the man and have spent time with him in a public place. Never be alone with any man before you get to know him. A player has a way of convincing you that he can be trusted, but in the dating game, trust no one.

3. If a man insist on being alone with you right away, not only is this a sign of a player, but it could be dangerous, as well. Never allow yourself to be alone with a stranger. Never assume that you know a man just because you have been dating him for a few weeks.

4. Most players will steer clear of a lot of friends. His friends sometimes know what he is and he will not take a chance of them making comments about all of his women. He may even keep you away from your friends and family because he knows other people might recognize what he is. Players can be very convincing, so please remember to keep your guard up and notice any of the symptoms that I mention.

5. Players, especially married ones, will avoid giving you any home numbers. He will usually never take you to his house unless he is rich and can afford a separate place to take his women. Be aware that he will make all kinds of excuses for not giving out his number. Some of those excuses are: It is a business phone and I am not allowed to give it out, or my roommate pays for it and does not like for me to give it to anyone. Another one is that he only has a cell phone or if he is young, he still lives with his mother. Yes, believe it or not, some men will use that one. Also, notice whether he blocks his number when he calls.

6. A player will tell you what he thinks you want to hear, from telling you he goes to church to saying that he does not drink, either. He will learn which buttons to push and have you believing that he is a real gentleman. Some players know how long to wait and will give you time before they get you where they want you. They will even stoop as low as to tell you that they love you. Trust me, there are probably five other women he has told the same thing.

7. A lot of players do not care about age. Some of them are out for different things such as money, sex, or just another notch on their belt. It does not have to be sex. Some players just like to leave a trail of broken hearts behind. It gives them a feeling of control. This is why it is important for older women to be aware of younger men who prey on lonely older women. They are so good at it that they know how to spot these kinds of women from across the room.

8. Players come in all shapes, sizes, ages and races. Not only do they prey on lonely older women, but on naive younger women, as well. A player will usually never let you know who he really is. Sure, he may tell you his name, but sometimes he will make up his personal life to suit his purpose. If he knows you are sensitive about a particular subject, he will usually make up something that involves whatever it is. He can often be very vague about his own life, but he will make sure that he knows everything about you. Be wary if he asks too many personal questions. He will use whatever you are sensitive about and make up some sad story in his own life. He wants you to think that he is sensitive and understanding to your needs. Do not fall for it. I know there are decent men who are not like this, but you have to guard your heart and give any relationship plenty of time.

9. A player, especially a married one, will usually meet you in places where no one knows him. If a man offers to meet you at some distant place, first of all, be sure it is safe. When a man continues to meet you somewhere and rarely picks you up, he usually has something to hide. He may be avoiding running into either his wife or his women. He has a better chance of slipping out if someone he knows walks in.

10. Never assume that you might be the one woman who can change a player. Most players sleep soundly at night and have no guilt about who they hurt. From my own observation, a player usually comes from a home where the father has very little respect for the mother. No matter how hard the mother tries to teach him to respect a woman, actions speak louder than words. Children learn more by what they see than by what they are told. A player is not going to change overnight. The only time I have witnessed a reformed player was when he was played by another player and had his own heart broken.

Tips & Warnings

• Always be careful when meeting someone new
• Never go out alone with a man you do not know
• Observe a man's body language and his expressions
• Look for signs of a player in any man when you first meet
• Keep your heart guarded and your brain on alert
• Not all men are players, so give the relationship a lot of time
• Even men who seem committed can turn out to be a player
• If you do meet a player, find the next exit
• Never think that you can change a player

[blakeurban]

on 8/26/2009 This is good solid advice on a topic that is unique. This is a must read and will benefit all who do. 5 star rating at top of article and 5 stars with comment. 10 out of 10. You've gained a recommendation.