How to Love Yourself Again

Loving yourself is important to developing feelings of self worth.

Finding a way to love yourself again after an event that has destroyed you, emotionally or otherwise, is a task that can be as overwhelming as it is rewarding. You must find a way to like who you are and embrace who you are becoming. Taking small, manageable steps will ensure that you successfully move forward in your attempts to love yourself and once again be happy.

Instructions

1. List your talents and good characteristics. (Reference 3) Be specific and thorough. Consider small things such as the ability to connect with older people that you meet. Type up the list and carry it with you as a constant reminder that you possess positive traits.

2. Pat yourself on the back every single day for something good you have done. (Reference 3) You deserve to praise yourself if you helped a child find a lost ball or if you did an extraordinary job at the office. Focus on the little positive things that you do as a reminder of the fact that you are a good person.

3. Start seeing a therapist who can help you deal with your feelings of inadequacy. (Reference 4) Allow this professional to guide you through the issues that make it hard for you to love yourself. Complete any tasks suggested by your therapist.

4. Challenge your poor self-esteem. Get rid of thoughts that make you believe you are not good enough and honestly examine the reasons why you hold these beliefs. (Reference 1) Take a close look at the events that caused you to stop believing that you should love yourself. Remind yourself that you deserve the happiness that comes with loving yourself.

5. Keep yourself well groomed. Keep your hair cut and shower daily. (Reference 5,6) Put on neat, clean clothes in the morning. Splurge and get a new pair of shoes. By treating yourself well, you are laying the groundwork for you to love yourself again.

6. Volunteer with a charitable organization. Knowing you are doing something good for others will help boost your self-esteem, thus increasing your ability to love yourself again. (Reference 2) Remember to pat yourself on the back every time you help at the organization.

7. Find a support system. (Reference 2) Let friends and family know that you are struggling to love yourself and ask for their help. Look for religious organizations that offer support groups for those who are emotionally impaired. Remind yourself that you need others to sustain you through this process and that it is okay to ask for help.

Tips & Warnings

• Choose a therapist you can trust. If need be, try several different therapists before you pick one that you are comfortable with.

• If you are feeling suicidal, contact a mental health care professional immediately.

References

• Mayo Clinic: Self-esteem-- Boost Your Self-image With These 5 Steps; 2010
• Mayo Clinic: How to Be Happy: Tips for Cultivating Contentment; 2010
• Strengthofus.com: What Can I Do to Feel Better About Myself?; 2010
• New Jersey Psychological Association Conference: Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment of Low Self-Esteem; Milton Spett, Ph.D.; 2005
• Children, Youth and Women Services: Personal Hygenie--Taking Care of Your Body; 2011
• Hygenie Expert: The Importance of Good Personal Hygiene; Jo Johnson; 2010