How to Control your Kids' Behavior
Controlling your kids' behavior can seem a daunting task, even with so many different toys and games to hold their attention. Having a good balance of right and wrong is especially important for young children because they need a strong foundation in place when they come under the authority of another adult, such as a teacher. Parents can take a number of simple steps to not only improve the attitude of their children, but improve the relationship too.
Other People Are Reading
Instructions
-
-
1
Provide structure to the day. Every day a child should get up at the same time, eat meals at the same time and go to bed at the same time. Children need structure in their lives to feel safe and secure, otherwise they may try to take control and provide their own structure. This does not mean, of course, that day trips and nice surprises aren't allowed, but most days should follow a clear, predictable schedule.
-
2
Stay firm and follow through with every direction. Giving in, even if one parent has been unfair, grants permission to a child to behave badly in the future. An argument with a child is a power struggle which the parents must win. Like any adult, children do not want to do certain things and wish to be in control, so a lack of consistency on the part of the parents provides an opening for the child to gain the upper hand.
-
-
3
Stop feeling guilty. It can be a hard to see a son or daughter upset, but ultimately providing a stable, consistent environment with clear consequences for bad behavior will make any child happier in the long run. Children need to know what the boundaries of acceptable behavior are so they can be sure their world has structure and limits and in turn, feel safe. Any momentary anger passes in a day or two, and as a child's behavior steadily improves, you will find the length of these tantrums won't last as long.
-
4
Use disciplinary tactics wisely. Children need to have clear consequences for naughty behavior, and the parent has the responsibility to not only make sure they know the rules, but to follow through with punishment. A proven method of discipline for children is to simply offer "one strike and you're out." The child knows the expected behavior in a given situation, and immediately goes in time out if he acts up. Do not speak to the child and do not give second chances.
-
5
Take your child by the hand, place him back in the time-out area, restarting the clock if he refuses to sit in his time-out zone. The length of time-out depends on the age of the child, and child experts recommend one minute per year of the child's age. At the end of the time-out, explain to the child that his behavior was unacceptable and you gave him a punishment because you love him.
-
1
Tips & Warnings
Be consistent and apologize later. If you feel that you have made a mistake, being consistent is more important than giving in to a tantrum. After everyone has calmed down, have a quiet word with the child, acknowledging any fault but explaining that tantrums are not the way to solve problems.
References
Resources
- Photo Credit Jupiterimages/Polka Dot/Getty Images
