How to Support a Friend Who Enlisted in the Military

If your best friend just told you that they are enlisting, chances are you are experiencing a range of emotions. You are very proud of them yet you are sad to see them go away. Follow these steps to support your friend and his or her decision to join the military.

Difficulty: Challenging

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Strength
• A solid friendship
• Writing supplies such as cards and stationary

1. 

   Support her decision. It may be shocking to hear that your friend is making such a drastic life change, but chances are she's thought about this long and hard before making a commitment. It's OK to tell her that you are surprised and even sad, but don't try to talk her out of it or put her down for making her decision.

2. 

   Make communicating pleasant. It's hard to go from talking to your best friend every day to rarely hearing from him, but that's the reality of military life (especially during basic training). If you write letters, try to keep them upbeat and encouraging. If he calls, try not to whine about how long it's been since you've talked to him. It's OK to tell him that you miss him, but for the most part try to brighten his day with your words. Assure him that he can talk to you about anything and be prepared if he needs to vent (or if he doesn't want to talk about the military at all).

3. 

   Actions speak louder than words. Try to show your friend that you are behind her 100%. If she has a going-away party, attend it and tell everyone there how proud of her you are. Make her something special, such as a card or a cake. Write her lots of letters. If you can, attend her graduation from basic training. (Remember, you do not have to spend a lot of money in order to show her that you care.)

4. Accept change. Your relationship will not be the same after your friend enlists. He will be gone for long periods of time and you may not get to talk to him very often. If you have a strong friendship, you will make it. The best of friendships endure a lot of growing and changing throughout the years.

Tips & Warnings

• It is natural to feel sad and cry when your best friend leaves. Don't bottle up your feelings, but also don't allow them to take over your life. Come to terms with them and then move on. Have faith that your best friend will be just fine and that this is going to give them a bright future.
• This advice also goes for spouses and other family members who enlist.

[betterbody]

on 10/14/2009 Very good points on supporting friends in the military.

[tracysmith159]

on 9/26/2009 Good article. Don't forget to send care packages if you can. Slim Jim are at the top of the list of most of the enlisted family and friends I know. They easy to send and they love'em.

[botticelli728]

on 8/6/2009 Thoughtful article on a serious topic. 5*