How to Learn Nonverbal Communication
Often, we find ourselves not able to properly relay a message as it is intended. When this happens, mistakes can be made, feelings can get hurt and the chain of communication is broken. Honing our communication skills can make us more effective both professionally and personally. You must understand that the value of the message lies in how it is interpreted, not how it is intended. Nonverbal communication makes up about 50 percent of what your audience is receiving. These cues include posture, eye contact, tone, gesturing and expressions. You can teach yourself to become a more effective speaker with nonverbal communication in a couple of different ways.
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Instructions
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How To Learn Nonverbal Communication
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Compose a message. To begin, come up with a message you wish to relay. This can be a funny or interesting story you heard.
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Find two different people to whom you can relay the message. Relay the message to each person in a separate place.
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For the first person, tell your story, using all of the most optimum non-verbal cues. Sit up straight, look them in the eye, smile, and use a tone of voice that pertains to the story. If the story is sad, keep your tone mellow, if it is happy, use a upbeat tone. Use hand gestures to emphasize points.
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Tell the story to the second person and do the opposite of what you did the first time. Look around the room, appear distracted, slump in your chair, keep your arms still, sound happy where the story should be sad and ignore your audience.
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When you have finished, ask each person to relay back to you what you just said. Find the differences in what they were able to get as the message of the story. Note the ways your non-verbal skills helped or hurt you.
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Be the listener. You can also learn nonverbal communication tactics as a listener. As in the above experiment, enlist the help of friends, only this time, ask them to tell you a story. For the first story, use positive nonverbal communication. Sit up straight, make eye contact, nod and smile when appropriate. For the second person, appear distracted, fidget, don't nod or make any appropriate facial expressions.
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Interview each person. As them how easy or difficult they would rate the relaying of their story to you under both circumstances. Ask if they felt you understood what they were trying to tell you. Note where good nonverbal cues helped the speaker get their message out and where poor cues caused the speaker to feel misrepresented.
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Tips & Warnings
Don't tell your friends what your intentions are. Let them get confused. Try applying your nonverbal skills all day long
If a friend begins telling you a serious story where your bad nonverbal reactions would be rude, drop the experiment and start over later.
References
- Photo Credit Photo by Elaine Procopio
