How to Find a Good Marriage Counselor

No one ever really wants their marriage to go so far as to need help with it. And honestly, when you finally break down to find that counselor who might save your marriage... You want someone you can trust. You want to be able to find someone who will listen, who will actually be able to suggest ideas but not place blame any where, and you want someone who will help. Because for most of us these people are our last step before divorce takes place and really unless it is absolutely healthier for us who wants to really go through a divorce and put so many years of a marriage of building a realationship behind them just to watch it end in a disaster? Not me! So I'm here to share with you some ways you can find someone who may just make all the difference in your life.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• intuition
• research
• referrals (if you can find them)

1. Find someone who will listen. Take time to talk with the therapist before actually going to see him / her. Does he / she take time to listen to you, your needs, and ask you questions about your marriage? If so then this is a good first sign that he/she is not just wanting to get you in there and charge you to talk while he/she listens and doodles.

2. Since this is still a marriage and you and your spouse are still together... Look for a "couples" counselor. A lot of counselors will do individual counseling, but honestly when the problem really lies between the two of you; I would personally look for a counselor who specializes in "couples" counseling. Hey, just a hint: but this means that you need to go as a couple. Also, look into how long the counselor has been practicing, as experience can aid in these situations.

3. Look Close & Inexpensive: Look I know that not everyone has all the money in the world to find the top-notch marriage counselors (honestly they usually never help anyways) I mean look at all of the celebrities that are constantly getting married then divorced. Make a budget range and find a therapitst that is in your locality within this range.

4. Again talking to the counselor is the key before actually seeing him/her. If you are looking to salvage what is left of your marriage you really don't want to be going to a counselor who shares opposite views of you. See what the counselor thinks about divorce and how she/he may help you with this opinion.

5. If your marriage has one particular focus such as constant abuse of drugs/alcohol/sex/affairs.... etc. Then it would be a better idea to find someone who focuses on this area in marriage counseling. Usually when a counselor goes to school it is mainly for marriage counseling but then later he/she may branch off to include a specialty area of aid.

6. Finally, if you know a couple who have previously had problems in their marriage and are now a happily married couple again, ask them if they went to a marriage counselor and who did they go to. References make bigger immpressions on a counselor and most of them will do anything to keep up that same reputation that was presented to the now "happily married couple".

Tips & Warnings

• Please remember that each marriage is different and that not every marriage can be/ or should be saved.
• If there is any signs of physical/mental/sexual abuse towards you or your children, I am only suggesting that your marriage is not worth yours or your child(rens) life. So if any of this is the case I can only suggest that you leave and not try to salvage this relationship as it is very unhealthy for all who stay in it.