How to Control Anger & Take Positive Action

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By paigeturner
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anger management

To control anger, you need to have anger management techniques ready. Anger can be triggered as a result of frustrating external circumstances that are out of your control (such as losing your job through no fault of your own). Anger can also be triggered when another person either doesn't meet your expectations or does something to cross your internal boundaries of right and wrong. This article focuses on how to control anger while taking positive action that will change your current situation into something better.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Step 1

Identify the Problem

The first step towards solving a problem is identifying the problem. Write down what you're angry about. If you're angry with someone specific, write down why you feel let down and what they did that caused you to get angry.
If you're angry at a situation (such as job loss), identify why you feel powerless, out of control or frustrated. Some times deep hurt takes the form of anger. Take the time to express why you feel hurt by either a person or a situation.
Step 2

Identify Situation Changing Positive Actions You Can Take

Identify the positive actions you can take to gain a sense of control within the situation. If a person crossed an internal line with you, decide if its worth it to tell the person what was offensive to you so they know how not to repeat the offense. If talking to them seems inappropriate, decide how you will react if the situation occurs again. Will you walk away and create distance between yourself and the other person? Will you pre-empt a touchy conversation with humor? Clearly visualize exactly what you would do. If you are battling external circumstances that appear to be out of your control, step back and think creatively. Are there things you could do that you hadn't even considered before? As an example, if you're dealing with job loss, could you take classes online and sign up for a conference while you engage in active job search. Is there a series of positive actions you can take that will change your situation? Even the act of identifying options will open up different avenues for you and remove that "out of control" feeling. Your anger will dissipate and change into hope.
Step 3

Take Action

Now that you know what you can do, be assertive, and take action. Go talk to the person you had a tiff with. Go change that external circumstance that was holding you hostage. Being assertive and proactive will change your entire thought process. Dealing with anger in a positive way will give you a reference point for future uncomfortable situations. In time, you will be able to control your anger and use strong emotion constructively.