How to Get a Restraining Order

A restraining order - also known as a protective order, order of protection, or protection from abuse order - is a legal document that prevents an individual from being in close proximity to or contacting another individual, group, or business. Restraining orders are usually sought by people who are being harassed or stalked, or who have been the victim of domestic or sexual violence. Most orders prevent the individual whom the order is against from coming within 100 to 500 feet of a person's home, workplace, or school, as well as contacting them by phone, e-mail, or any other correspondence, including sending packages or gifts. If you feel you are in need of protection, here is how to get a restraining order:

Instructions

1. 

   Visit Your County Courthouse

   To file a restraining order, you will need to pick up the appropriate forms from the county courthouse in the Family court division in the area where you live. You can ask for the forms to file a restraining order from the clerk of the court. You may also be able to find the forms you need online, by visiting your state's official website, and searching for "restraining order form." Not all states have these forms available for download online, however. You can call your courthouse and ask the clerk of the court for more information on where to find these forms.

2. 

   Fill Out the Forms to File Your Complaint

   A complaint is a document that you file with the court to initiate a lawsuit; that is what the forms you obtained from the courthouse will serve as. Bring them home and carefully fill them out, explaining why you need the restraining order, previous incidents of violence or harassment that have led you to file for a restraining order, and include dates, places, and photographs documenting these incidents whenever possible. Keep in mind that the clerk cannot help you fill out the forms; the only person who can help you fill out the complaint is an attorney.

   Do not sign the forms after you have completed them. You will need to sign them in the presence of a notary public, who will the notarize the forms for you so that they can be filed. If you cannot find a notary, contact the clerk of the court. In most cases, the clerk can act as notary for you; if not, they will be able to direct you to a notary who can help you.

3. 

   File the Forms with the Family Courthouse

   Once the forms have been completed, signed, and notarized, it is time to file them. Go to the same county courthouse where you picked up the forms, in the Family court division, and tell the clerk that you would like to file to get a restraining order. You will need to bring identification with you, like your driver's license, and be able to provide information about the person you are filing for protection from, such as their name and address. You will be given a date for a hearing, either at the time of filing, or within a few days via mail.

4. 

   Attend Your Hearing - And Bring Evidence

   You must attend the hearing to get a restraining order, or the matter will be dropped - and it may be held against you if you try to file for a restraining order again in the future. At the hearing, the judge will ask you to explain why you need a retraining order. If the person who is abusing or harassing you is at the hearing, it may be hard for you to tell your story, but stay strong. Keep your eyes only on the judge, and do not so much as glance at your abuser. Give the judge a detailed explanation of every previous incident, provide photographs and other evidence you may have, and explain how you have tried to avoid your abuser. Explain why you are in fear that they will continue to harm or harass you.

   If your abuser does not show up to the hearing, the judge may still allow you to continue your case, or, the judge may grant a continuance, which means the hearing will take place at a later time when your abuser is available. Do not let this get you down - sometimes, abusers will continue to postpone or not show for hearings in an attempt to avoid the situation and scare you. After a few continuances or no-shows, the judge will ultimately allow the hearing to continue without your abuser present.

   If your abuser hires an attorney to represent him or her, you may want to look into hiring an attorney for yourself. If you cannot afford an attorney, you can contact the clerk of the court for more information on legal aid, which will help you get an attorney on a sliding scale fee or for free if your income qualifies you for it. If you do not qualify for legal aid, but cannot afford an attorney, don't worry - if you stay strong and present your case, even an attorney cannot protect your abuser from a restraining order.

5. 

   What Happens After the Hearing

   If the judge rules in your favor, the restraining order is effective immediately and permanently. The restraining order does not expire, although you can request that the judge drop the restraining order at a later time if you no longer feel you are in danger. If you get a restraining order against an ex-husband or ex-wife, the restraining order will most likely prevent them from seeing your child as well, but will not terminate any child support or alimony that you are currently receiving.

   If your abuser or harasser violates your restraining order, do not try to confront them yourself. Instead, immediately call 9-1-1 and tell the dispatcher that you have a restraining order against an individual and they are currently violating it. Law enforcement will then arrest the individual, and based on the situation, will require them to pay a fine, or even spend time in jail.

Resources

• Handbook of Domestic Violence Intervention Strategies: Policies, Programs, and Legal Remedies
• Healing the Trauma of Domestic Violence: A Workbook for Women
• STOP Domestic Violence: Innovative Skills, Techniques, Options, and Plans for Better Relationships: Group Leader's Manual
• When Dad Hurts Mom: Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse