How to Start Life Over After Divorce
A divorce can leave you emotionally and mentally broken, but you have to pick up the pieces and move on. While divorce is the end of one part of your life, it is the beginning of another. With a good support system and the right attitude, you can stop focusing on the past and focus on the future.
- Difficulty:
- Moderately Challenging
Instructions
-
-
1
Relocate to a new city. If there are no children involved, or if there are and you have full custody, consider moving to a new city where you won't be reminded of your ex. Moving to a new place will help you let go and focus on starting over. If moving to a new city isn't possible, move to a new home and start creating new memories.
-
2
Find a new hobby. Do something you always wanted to try, but never got the chance. Take a painting class at the local college, sign up for yoga or learn a new language. Do something that makes you feel good about yourself.
-
3
Find a support network. Reacquaint yourself with your friends or make new friends who can empathize with what you are going through. Look for support groups in your area for divorced people or single parents. It helps to talk to people going through the same thing as you. Visit divorcecare.org to find a support group near you. You can also join forums like ehealthforum.com, divorcesupport.com and loveshack.org to talk to people who are experiencing the same life transition.
-
4
Minimize pain or difficulties for your children. According to heartlandcounseling.org, do not pretend to be good friends with your ex in front of the children. This confuses them and gives them false hope that you may get back together. Additionally, do not use your children as a tool to get back at each another. They will want to spend time with both parents, and you can't let your divorce interfere with that. If your children have trouble at school or are sullen and uncommunicative, a good counselor can work with them on learning to adjust to the divorce.
-
5
Seek counseling or therapy if you have pent-up anger and emotions that you don't understand or cannot handle. If you don't find a healthy way to release your anger, you may take it out on those around you.
-
6
Write a letter to your ex expressing your anger and pain, but don't send it. While the relationship has ended, you may have unanswered questions and feel you need closure. Writing a letter will help you release all of that emotion. This is a practice counselors often use.
-
7
Go on a date. Getting back into the dating scene will give you a confidence boost and take your mind off your divorce.
-
1
Related Searches
References
- Photo Credit Pixland/Pixland/Getty Images
