How to Stop Yelling At Your Child or Children

At one time or another everyone has yelled at their child. However, if yelling is something that occurs every day at your house; This guide is for you.

Yelling usually causes a child to ignore your request and tune out loud sound. Speaking in a regular tone allows for your child to hear what you are saying.

Difficulty: Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Listening
• Time
• Patience
• Talking with your child

1. 
    
   Children do not like to be yelled at

   Understand why you are yelling. Use a list to write down the situations in which you yell at your child or children. Use a recorder like camera recorder or audio recorder to video tape you or your spouse yelling at your child. Play it back after your children go to bed. Notice your child's face, look at your face, listen to the tone. Reflect upon what you see.
   
   There is an easier way to stop yelling at your child and teach them how to listen.

2. 
    
   Sometimes you may yell because of frustrations from the external environment

   In the Bible yelling is only found 1 time. Talking - 82 times and teaching - 109 times. There most of your time should be spent talking and teaching your child.
   
   Teach your child how to listen to you by talking to them about you yelling. Ask them these questions "Do you like it when I yell?" "Why do you think I yell at you" "How can you help mommy and daddy not to yell at you?" Listen to the responses.

3. 
    
   Teach your children to listen to you

   You now know why you yell and how your children feel about it. Follow up with the recommendations they give you for not yelling.
   
   Also implement the following:
   - Call and response rule. When you call your child's name tell them they are required to respond back by stating "Yes". If they do not hear you they must say "What did you say?".
   
   - Count down rule - Although using this teaches children they do not have to listen the first time. Sometimes it's necessary when they are playing and enjoying an activity. If they are playing tell them they have 5 minutes, 3 minutes, and 1 minute left. This will get them use to budgeting their time.
   
   Practice this in the comfort of your living room. Make it into a game so they can get use to responding to your voice in a natural non-yelling tone. Depending upon they age, they make take more practice to get use to your "non yelling" tone.

4. If you feel the need to yell do not. Count to 5 and calmly tell your child what you want them to do. Tell them the time frame. For example if you want your child to pick up their toys call them over to you. Get on their level or pick them up. Ask them to pick up the toys right now because.....
   
   This will allow your child to have your attention and understand that the task is important to you.

Tips & Warnings

• Spend time with your child without interruptions.
• Use call and response technique often for practice
• If you find yourself unable to stop yelling take a moment to talk to someone.
• Continue to read books on yelling.

[smiletimes4]

on 5/15/2009 Really good tips!

[rob654]

on 5/1/2009 great info

[Tehilliahwriter]

on 4/30/2009 This is a must read for all of us who are already yelling at our lives! We can't approach everything with the same strategy and especially our children and our families. Our little and big ones our mere innocent bystanders who deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. I thank you for expressing your thoughts and conveying them with clarity! superb! 5****'s.Blessings and Favor,Tehilliahwriter

[3-Point]

on 4/29/2009 Well done! Thanks for the info.

[maria909]

on 4/27/2009 this one is a good parenting tip!