How to Lecture a Tween or Teen

Bill, the father of two boys ages 13 and 17, is a creative thinker with an original parenting style. He lectures his boys on issues they're facing. His lectures are not the typical parenting reprimands that go in one ear and out the other. His lectures are not the unfocused discourses that kids turn a deaf ear to. Bill delivers inspiring talks with an entertaining twist. His formal presentations began when the boys were in grade school and have continued into their teens. At least three times a year or when the situation calls for it, Bill delivers a thoughtful message. Here is how he does it.

Things You'll Need

• Jokes
• Black board
• A clear message
• Handouts
• Snacks

Instructions

1. Compile topics. Bill keeps an ongoing list of subjects he wants to cover before the kids leave home. When the boys were in grade school he held lectures around the kitchen table on what qualities make a good brother. He has spoken on money management and cleaning the bathroom, but those weren't as well-received as the ones that included Bill's philosophy of striving to be a good man inside and out. As the boys mature, the topics mature too.

2. Consider the message. What do you want to tell your kids? What do you want your children to have mastered by the time they're no longer under your direct influence? Bill came up with the idea of formal Saturday morning presentations to make sure he told the kids what he wanted them to know. Bill researches his subject, reflects on the points he wants to share and when he's satisfied that his message is clear, he's ready to schedule.

3. Make like a professor. According to Bill, lectures are a good parenting tool as long as you're not scolding. The purpose of a lecture is to teach something that the kids want to learn and need to know. Lectures he says are not effective if you're scolding. That puts the kids off. Kid are not be able to learn, listen or gain skills when being reprimanded. Bill uses Saturday morning breakfast lectures for imparting exciting information that will inspire his sons. They pay attention because the three of them are having fun together.

4. Use tools. Attendance is mandatory, but coordinate with everyone's schedules. Bill may give handouts, write on a blackboard or demonstrate with a power point presentation. He uses humor, jokes, cartoons and snacks to grab the kids' attention. It's a bonding experience because Dad shares a personal experiences from his own life too.

5. Pay attention to your audience. Bill's kids have been attending Saturday morning lectures since grade school. When the kids were young with short attention spans, the lecture might have lasted only 10 minutes. The lecture entitled: "The fine art of putting the toilet seat down" was the shortest and lasted two minutes. As attention spans developed, the subjects were more complicated and longer. "How to shave" included a demonstration. The topic: "How to treat a woman" was so well received that the kids invited their friends for an encore presentation.

6. Keep it snappy. Haven't you noticed that when you lecture on and on and on the kids tune out? They stare into space, wiggle and eyes glaze over if you're not entertaining. Bill considers his lectures as a form of guidance, and so he makes each presentation snappy and encouraging. Stay on point. Don't scold or belittle. Keep your message uplifting and kids will be inspired.

7. Take questions. Serve snacks. Pass out handouts. Saturday morning presentations-even if they're scheduled for Wednesday night-may become a treasured family ritual, a rite of passage celebrating growing up.

8. Thank the audience. Every good teacher needs a good student. If the kids listen and indulge your desire to lecture, be sure to thank them. Without them where would you be? "My kids have learned to humor me and I appreciate it," Bill says.