How to Understand a Family Member's Physical Disability

Disability can strike anyone, anywhere, anytime. If someone in your family is or becomes disabled, you can best cope by concentrating on the person rather than the disability.

Difficulty: Moderately challenging

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Power Wheelchairs
• Anger-management Counseling
• Stress Management Counseling
• Computer Mice
• Computer Monitors
• Computer Desks
• Manual Wheelchairs
• Wheelchair Gloves
• Wheelchair Mini Ramps
• Wheelchair Ramps
• Internet Access
• Support Groups
• Computers

1. Consult with the medical professionals involved.

2. Consult occupational, physical and mental health therapists as necessary.

3. Consult disability and independent-living specialists.

4. Remain positive and open to the concerns of everyone in your family.

5. Exercise patience.

6. Realize that a disabled person must cope with guilt and frustration.

7. Listen and communicate. Hear what's being said, but think about what's been left unsaid.

8. Assist and support without coddling.

9. Take a caregiver break when necessary.

10. Support and encourage independence and self-responsibility.

11. Work to decrease social isolation.

12. Consider membership in caregiver and disability support groups.

13. Understand that a newly disabled person may feel he cannot reassert control over his life. Encourage him to do so.

14. Forget about the person's disability. Continue to love the person.

Tips & Warnings

• A network of nonprofit, independent-living service agencies provides support. Check your local telephone directory.
• Computers and Internet access are a boon to disability networking.
• If the disabled family member is a child, siblings will need special help in understanding the disability and its influence on the family.
• Temporary frustration and anger are natural reactions. There's no need to feel guilt.
• Coping with a severe, long-term disability is stressful for the disabled person and for family members. Too much stress can cause depression. Understand your limitations and consult a counselor if necessary.

[missjuliet]

on 2/25/2009 i am a very nice looking girl seeking an honest man who will be taking good care of me

[quartznh]

on 12/30/2008 As a person with a disability and working for a non-profit disability organization, I have to agree with many of these tips. My family still have not accepted my physical limitations and increasing lack of mobility. I've had my disabilities since I was born.

I can only change myself and continue living my life for myself. At least my husband and his family have accepted me 100% and I can actually be myself around them.

[kkeefenj]

on 12/11/2008 When offering help to a disabled person (for example, in cleaning or straightening up their house) resist the urge to take charge. Let the disabled person give the instructions and do things their way. The disabled person has lost enough control of their life; let them keep control of their home and/or surroundings as much as possible. All too often, people offer help only on their own terms - and that's not really helpful. A disabled person doesn't want to sit by and watch someone else breeze in and reorganize their house in a way that makes no sense to them. They'd prefer to do it themselves, but since they can't, at least give them the courtesy of doing things the way they would do it if they could. How would you like it if someone came along and reorganized your kitchen so you couldn't find anything? Don't do it to a disabled person - it's not helpful, it's cruel.

on 7/29/2006 Most people think that people with disabilities want to talk about themselves or the problem all the time. Wrong. Tell us what's going on with you and your life. A glimpse, however brief it may be, let's us forget our troubles.