How to Deal With and Handle a Difficult Boss

Don't let an angry boss ruin your day.

In many people's ideal worlds, everyone would be rich and not need to work. Alas, reality is a bit more harsh, and many people depend on jobs overseen by a boss. Problematic bosses, whether they have difficult management styles, communication problems or anger issues, can leave you feeling unmotivated to get up in the morning, frustrated or even humiliated. Take charge of the situation; don't let your boss get the best of you.

Difficulty:

Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Take a deep breath. Psychologist Marilyn Puder-York writes on the American Psychological Association website that if you don't pause and manage your own negative emotions, you may take up self-defeating behaviors that only serve to make things worse. Stay positive, focus on the good elements in your workplace and tell yourself that your difficulties with your boss don't lower your inherent value as a person.

2. Identify your boss's preferred work style and try to style your work performance to match it. For example, a micromanaging boss may love it when you give him a day-by-day, step-by-step progress report on a project's status, while that may annoy a "big picture" boss who only wants a bullet point report that gives an overall summary of a project at the end. Not understanding your boss' style can result in annoyances, miscommunication and disagreements on both your parts.

3. Keep communication channels open, and change your communication if necessary. For example, if your boss doesn't respond to your emails, you may need to set up daily, brief meetings. Many "bad" bosses aren't purposely trying to be bad, reports "Certification" magazine, but simply don't know your frustrations, current stress load or workplace needs.

4. Take responsibility for any faults or problems you may have created that may be causing your boss difficulty or stress. There are usually two or more sides to a difficult workplace scenario. For example, if you've recently underperformed or made a mistake that your boss has been forced to explain to her supervisor, she might channel her resentment toward you. Taking classes or training to resolve your personal issues can help improve your personal performance, and thus your relationship with your boss.

5. Bring a third party into the equation, typically in the form of human resources, if your difficulties with your boss revolve around verbal abuse, harassment and other serious situations. Keep written records of any times that you've felt your boss has treated you inappropriately.

References

• American Psychological Association; Managing Your Boss; Marilyn Pruder-York
• "Best of Harvard Business Review"; Managing Your Boss; John Gabarro and John Kotter; January 2005
• "Certification Magazine"; Have a Difficult Boss? Avoid These Mistakes; Katherine Spencer Lee; December 2005
• "O, The Oprah Magazine"; Work Nightmare #1: The Very Bad Boss; Suzy Welch; May 2007
• "Today's Accounting Manager"; Working With a Difficult Boss; Max Messmer; October 2003
• Center for Psychiatric Rehabilitiation: Dealing with a Difficult Supervisor