How to Get Over Yourself and Become Part of Solutions

There are always two sides to every story and then, of course, there is reality which is a collision of the two sides. I use the word collision because generally, one or both parties in a disagreement are stubborn, bull headed individuals who want to be right at all costs. Why, because they are full of their own inflated viewpoint of themselves as a person who is always right. These are the same individuals who were poor sports when they were children. They would never admit when they would strike out that it was because they missed the ball or were called out on strikes. They insisted that they were out because the umpire was wrong. These are people who are filled with an inability to get over themselves. If you recognize yourself in this description it's time for you to learn how to get over yourself and to become part of the solution to any problem you face.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

1. ANALYZE YOUR MOTIVES for your self-assured arrogance. Are you full of yourself because you're searching for control and power as a path to admiration. Many people want to control not only their opinions but also those of everyone around them. Many politicians and media personalities are examples of this behavior. They will say anything to convince others to believe them. They will even LIE. Often the desire to gain power and control are ways to seek admiration from others and to gloss over fears that no one will view them with admiration. Admiration is not earned by arrogance.

2. FACE YOUR FEARS. Often the reason that a person is so adamant about making their point is that they are afraid of what the outcome might be if they are wrong. They fear the outcome so much or they fear the unknown or any changes in their life so much that they will not consider that there is any correct outcome in any disagreement than the one that they are presenting. Ask yourself if the reason you are trying to make the point you are presenting is connected to fear of any other outcome on the issue being discussed.

3. REALIZE THAT NO ONE IS ALWAYS RIGHT and in most cases both sides have some merit to their viewpoints. Being confident in your viewpoints and your abilities is not the same thing as being arrogant. Confidence is good, arrogance is not. If you cannot change your viewpoint then you should be able to substantiate it and prove that it is correct. If you cannot prove your point then you must acknowledge that fact. In other words if you're going to talk the talk you should be able to walk the walk. Arrogance becomes earned confidence if you can prove your point.

4. AGREE TO DISAGREE AND/OR TO COMPROMISE. Sometimes there is no way to prove a winning side in a difference of opinion and the only way to come to a resolution or a solution to the disagreement is to agree to disagree. If your arrogance will not ever allow you to do that you may have a behavioral problem that is out of control. If at any time you feel that your arrogance is causing out of control temper tantrums you may wish to seek professional counseling. It is generally normal to disagree with others sometimes but if it leads to bouts of bad temper, angry outbursts or worse - your arrogance may be out of control. If at any time you feel that your arrogance is causing out of control temper tantrums you may need to seek professional counseling.

5. LEND A HELPING HAND AND TAKE A HELPING HAND. Whether you agree or disagree with the viewpoints of someone else, please make an effort to get over yourself and to pitch in and help and to support solutions that are being put into place for problems. To stubbornly hold fast to your opinions to the point where you would rather see failure for the other person involved in a disagreement than to admit that someone else might have a better idea than you do is, quite simply put, bull headed bad manners. No one is right all the time. Be a part of the solutions to problems at hand. Get over yourself!