How to Like Myself

We don't always like ourselves. As if that isn't painful enough, we pile on the guilt, thinking that our own esteem should be unconditional.

I've learned to reframe that in a way that makes life work better for me. Maybe it will ring true for you too.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Yourself
• A clear mindset

1. 
    

   Love is Unconditional
   
   I believe that my Creator always loves me. I know that I always love my child, even when she challenges me.
   
   Once when I was on a date with my husband, he had one cup of coffee too many and went on one of those, "I'm talking and I can't shut up," jags. He was getting a bit loud and had blown well past the bounds of courtesy. I remember looking at him and quietly and firmly saying, "I love you, but I don't like you very much right now." It definitely got his attention!
   
   Haven't we all felt that way sometimes, and especially toward ourselves? I have chosen to love and value myself always. That is something I can simply claim, no matter what emotions I may be experiencing.

2. 
    

   Like is Another Matter
   
   If I don't take care of myself, live up to my responsibilities, or treat others with kindness, I can become pretty angry and frustrated with myself. Those are natural consequences.
   
   The good news is that I understand that now, and can make conscious choices to turn the tide.

3. 
    

   Cultivating Like
   
   One of my mottos is, "Do as you purpose." It's about keeping promises, especially the ones I make to myself. Each time I "purpose" and follow through, my sense of integrety rises a bit. My esteem for myself goes up a notch.
   
   Everyone's purposes are unique. For me, right now, my purposes are:
   1) Pray daily
   2) Make sure I keep my mental and emotional doors open to my daughter
   3) Do something during the course of my day that enhances my husband's life
   3) Write something every day
   4) Spend 4 hours each week moving my body
   5) Ensure that our animals are cared for
   
   Love is a given. But when I do these these things, as I purpose, I get to like myself too. For me, that brings peace.

Resources

• Kate's Faves

[ljbinkop]

on 5/4/2009 This is especially important for helping with my two daughters to cultivat self esteem early in life. Thanks for the tips!

[Wasatch]

on 2/19/2009 This is a very important topic. Especially with your teens.

[HVLong]

on 2/15/2009 Solid advice.

[igaday]

on 2/15/2009 Good advice. Thanks. =)

[sneedc]

on 2/14/2009 Be gentle with yourself and others is my purpose. This is an awesome article! And I love your avatar, too! Woo Hoo! 5*