How to Become an Active Listener
Most people are willing to take training to become better speakers because they want to become more effective negotiators or presenters. Such training is obviously worthwhile but so is learning to become a better listener, which too often receives secondary attention at best. Improving your conversational listening skills is a matter of implementing several basic but crucial steps.
- Difficulty:
- Moderately Easy
Instructions
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Pay attention. This means looking directly at the speaker, concentrating and devoting your full attention, refusing to let your mind wander. To aid understanding, watch for body language cues. Do not get distracted and resist the temptation to interrupt or argue.
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Acknowledge you are listening. Keep your posture and demeanor relaxed and nonjudgmental, while using appropriate facial expressions based on the cues you receive. Also nod occasionally or deliver a sincere "uh-huh" or "yes" to keep the speaker going. Do not talk until the speaker is completely finished.
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Verify what you heard. To enhance your understanding, ask questions to clarify. Also paraphrase and ask if you heard correctly. Try to be empathetic, reflecting the speaker’s emotions and summarizing what you heard.
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Respond appropriately. Be sure to respectfully share honest and relevant beliefs, feelings or opinions. Be willing to repeat the foregoing steps when your counterpart speaks again.
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References
- Photo Credit Polka Dot Images/Polka Dot/Getty Images
Comments
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Kim Marie
Feb 02, 2009
Honesty is important and so is active listening. You can tell a lot by a person's eyes and facial expression. It is rare to find a "good" listener who hears and reflects what you say. Good article!
