How to Come Up With Conversation Topics for a First Date

Get to know your date gradually without being too blunt.

Getting ready for a first date with a new person can be overwhelming, especially if you've been out of the dating game for a while, or if you are generally a quiet person. You may be worried about coming up with things to talk about on your date, and that's normal. Coming up with conversation topics is easier if you listen intently and show a genuine interest in your date.

Instructions

1. Think about what you already know about your date before the actual meeting. Keep a mental note of your date's hometown, profession and hobbies.

2. Work is usually a good topic for a first date. Ask about your date's career and how your date got into that field. Because most people spend a majority of their time at work, it's something that they can easily talk about. Just don't let it be all you talk about because you want to discuss fun things too.

3. Find out what genres of music or artists your date likes. Ask about your date's music collection, or live shows your date has seen.

4. Discuss your favorite movies and TV shows, and what it is you like about them and why. You can find out a lot about your date simply by discussing entertainment preferences.

5. Talk about travel and all the places you've seen or lived in. If you and your date find that you have traveled to or lived in the same places, you can find many related topics to talk about.

6. If you have mutual friends (perhaps those who set you up for the date), talking about them can uncover similar interests. However, remember not to gossip about other people. Keep it friendly.

7. Talk about where you went to school. A whole treasure trove of topics can come out of this one: your major, your fraternity, your school's location, and so on.

8. Let the conversation flow naturally. It's always a good idea to come up with conversation topics before your date, but once you are on the date, let it happen spontaneously as much as possible.

Tips & Warnings

• If the conversation seems to be lagging, move on to another topic.

• Don't be afraid of a little silence every once in a while. You don't have to talk every second.

• Be a good listener. When you ask your date a question, be sure you are giving room to hear the answer.

• Stay far away from topics like politics and religion on a first date.

• Avoid talking about very personal topics, like your exes, or sharing really personal information, like about your health problems.

• Don't vent all your life's troubles onto your date. Keep it interesting, positive and light.

References

• eHarmony Advice: 15 Great First Date Questions