How to Avoid Doing Household Chores
Let's face it - nobody wants to do their fair share of household chores. Here are the easy ways to avoid them and become lazy, free, and happy! Does this Spark an idea?
Instructions
-
-
1
Procrastinate. This is your first step. If you simply avoid doing chores for long enough, sometimes other people will do them for you. However, you should be aware that they might not fall for the bait here and you could have to suffer the consequences of nobody doing them...
-
2
Outsource. Getting others to do your work in your place is a great way to appear productive without having to do any actual work. Often, the people best suited for this outsourcing are already in your home! They are the ones that see a candy bar a great reward.
-
-
3
Fail. The worse a job you do, the more likely people will stop asking to you to chores for them in the future. Just think...freedom is just a few screw ups away!
-
4
Rationalize. Convince everyone else that certain chores are no longer necessary and that nobody ever needs to do them anymore. For example, you could say that since you don't have visitors that often, nobody ever needs to pick up the yard again.
-
5
Lie. After going to the doctor for a regular checkup, come back and tell everyone you found out that you only have a few months left to live. Everyone will feel so sorry for you that you won't have to do any chores! Or at least you won't have to until they figure out that you are healthy.
-
6
Give up. Realize that most of the items in this list are unrealistic and unhelpful. Understand how annoying it for other people who have to live with someone like you. Just realize you were wrong and do your chores. Then move on to better things in life.
-
1
Tips & Warnings
There's never a chore too big for an excuse
He who dies having done the least chores wins
Don't actually tell your family that you are dying. That would be mean. Unless you really are dying. Then it's ok.
Don't take what you read in this article to heart. It was meant to be funny.
Resources
- Photo Credit Flickr creative commons
More Like This
Comments
View all 6 Comments-
SuzyQ74
Mar 24, 2009
Gave me a laugh. Now if my job didn't require me to clean I could do that (I'm a Domestic Goddess). And my slaves (aka children) are all in school....and the dog only helps clean up the left over food. She does dishes well tho.
-
texasparky
Feb 27, 2009
I'm already an expert at this topic, but thanks anyway...Great read!
-
K M
Feb 18, 2009
Very funny. 5*. I am also new to eHow, just started this month. I have only written 8 easy to read articles so far and if you rr mine, I will do the same for you! I look forward to working with you! :)
-
Sandra Mireles
Feb 13, 2009
Very cute! Entertaining!
-
hoolihan0519
Feb 10, 2009
Very hilarious article. Love your style. If only.......... RCRR.
